My Imaginary Angel
by PaperGanstah
Summary: Dean and Sam have just lost their mother when John begins to wane in his role of father. Mary always told Dean that angels were watching over him and eventually he gets his own angel. Can their friendship last forever or will he outgrow his angel? C/D
1. Angels Watching Over You

**Yes, I am back with another story already :O So here you go, I hope you like it! I love to get reviews, so if you leave a comment I will definitely read it :) Enjoy!**

**-Paperganstah**

** Dean and Sammy have just lost their mother when John begins to wane in his role of father. Mary always told Dean that angels were watching over him. And she was right. This is a kid fic-teen-ish/possibly adult-ish ages. Cas is assigned as Dean's guardian angel. Although people do not believe Dean that Cas exists, he does and for a while that is all that matters. It is enough for Dean. Can their friendship last past childhood or will there come a time when Dean no longer needs his angel? Only time will tell…**

"Angels Watching Over You"

Dean lost his mother at a very young age. He didn't know if the tragedy was worse for him or little Sammy, but sometimes he felt like the burden was harder for him to bear. He knew his mother. For the short years they had together he knew what it was like to have a mother. Someone to tuck him in at night. To chase away the monster under the bed, not send him after them with a rifle. To love him unconditionally and always put him first. After her death Dean had tried to emulate her. He tried to put Sammy before himself even when he was scared senseless half the time. Sammy always got the last of the Lucky Charms, the comforting lies about what their dad really did, the peace of mind, at least for a while. Dean protected his brother for as long as he could, but he never felt that he could replace what his mother had done for him. But Dean still needed someone to love him. To take away the bitterness that he had to fight just as often as the real physical beasts that crept along in the darkness. Vile creatures that escaped the minds of many and tormented the minds of the Winchesters. Mary had never wanted to leave Dean alone, and for a time he wasn't.

"_Good night Dean." _

"_No Mommy! Do I hafta stay in here by myself? The monsters will get me." Mary had just smiled and tucked her four year old son into his bed._

"_But you aren't alone sweetie."_

_Dean nodded stubbornly, hoping that she would finally catch on and understand his plight. "You and Daddy get to share a room. Can I stay there too?"_

_Mary pulled him into her arms. "No honey. You are a big boy and this is room is just for you. Is there something in here that scares you?" She ruffled his hair. "Want me to look through the closet again?"_

_Dean shook his head. "I checked earlier. It's clean. I just don't wanna be in here by myself all night long."_

"_Remember what I told you honey? Just between us?"_

"_That Mrs. Johnson wears the same skirt every time you see her?"_

"_Oh dear, you still remember me saying that?" Mary covered up a laugh with her hand as Dean grinned and hugged her arm."No silly. That angels are watching over you. Even when I am in my room, which is very close to yours, they are there protecting you."_

"_Just me?" Dean fidgeted with his blanket. "Do they watch over you too? Like stare down at you all the time?" Dean looked up at the ceiling suspiciously. "That's kinda creepy." _

_Mary laughed. "I think it's more like a feeling. They sense when you are in danger and protect you from it."_

"_Like Santa?"_

"_Yes like Santa." Mary kissed his cheek. "But Santa just senses that you are going to be spoiled rotten this Christmas."_

"_Do you think so?"_

_Mary gave him her best conspirator's wink. "I know so. You've been good this year haven't you?" Dean nodded fervently. "Then Santa will know that. Good night Dean."_

"_Good night Mommy!" Dean pretended to snuggle under his blanket and once Mary closed the door he bolted out of bed and peeked out of the window. "I don't see any angels." Dean checked his closet one more time before getting in bed and folding his hands. "Just don't stare at me in the potty room okay? I think I am pretty much safe there." Dean didn't get any response, angelic or not, but he did feel like he had cleared up something with them. If Santa knew that he wanted a bicycle for Christmas then those angels had better listen to him too._

"Okay Dean. You are going to watch Sammy when I'm gone. It will just be a day or two."

Dean pulled a face. "But Sammy always poops in his diaper. It's just me and Sammy when you're gone?"

"Yeah. Sorry Dean." John didn't notice the anguish on his five-year-old's face. "I need you to be tough for me Dean, can you do that?"

"I don't know. This isn't our house."

John ran a hand through his untidy hair tiredly. "I know that. It's not our house, but the motel is temporary. It is home until I get that thing that killed your mother."

Dean sniffled and wiped his eyes. "But Sammy and I aren't safe here."

"Yes you are. I left a gun you can shoot without too much kick and I will be sure to tell Bobby to call and check up on you guys each day."

"But the angels can't protect us here!"

John looked confused and sat down his over-packed bag. "What?"

"They don't know where we are!"

John squatted down and looked Dean in the eyes. "They do and they will keep you safe." He figured that that was what Mary would have wanted him to say but Dean still looked troubled.

"They can't find us."

"Yes they can." John started to look exasperated when he saw the broken look Dean was giving him.

"Santa didn't."

Dean wandered over to the microwave and heated some water to warm up baby Sammy's bottle. John stood there and realized that he really had been a terrible father the past few months. He hadn't even though about Christmas and it had passed without giving him the chance to miss it. And Dean hadn't said a word.

"Hey, I'll make it up to you buddy. How about we have our own Christmas when I get back from this trip?" He ruffled Dean's hair and slung his bag over his shoulder. Dean nodded and went back to work as John kissed Sam on the forehead and left.

John was gone for over a week. Bobby was in the middle of an investigation and wired the cash to Dean to keep up the motel room. When John came back there was alcohol in his bag instead of presents and the Winchester Christmas was forgotten. John passed put on the couch and Dean pulled a blanket over him before making sure that Sam was sound asleep.

Dean wandered over to his own bed and scrunched up his eyes for a few minutes. "Okay. So I don't know you guys that well but Mommy made you sound good. So…angels? If any if you are listening. I-I'm scared. I know you thought I lived somewhere else, but I don't any more. I don't have a home right now but maybe you can still find me. Room 232 at the Super 8 motel in Virginia. I can't be scared or Sammy will get scared too. And then he cries and Daddy hates that. Plus I just don't like being scared. Good night."

Over the next month things got worse. John often found more comfort at the bottom of a bottle than in his own family. He was gone more often than when he was there. And when he did show up it was to research a case or to move his boys somewhere else across the country. There were times that he remembered to throw a ball around with Dean or teach him how to shoot more accurately but these moments were becoming rare.

Dean had heard nothing from the angels and was worried that Santa had snitched on him for being bad. He didn't know what he was doing wrong but he knew that there had to be a problem. Dean was already beginning to give up on the real world and often found himself lost in a television program or the own designs of his imagination. Dean killed monsters and saved his mother as little Sammy drooled by his side. He fought dragons, and ogres, and Santa over and over again. Sometimes the angels helped him out, but Dean could always get the job done on his own. He had to.

John was gone for almost two weeks when Dean took Sammy out for a walk around the small town that housed one of the world's crappiest motels. Dean hated the orange blankets and poor excuses for paintings in their room so he took little Sammy out for some fresh air. Sam giggled and threw his juice on the ground. Dean reached down to pick it up when he felt something feathery collide with him. He sat there dazed. Then he saw a small boy that looked about his age look solemnly at him through curious blue eyes. His hair was tousled and brown and he had on a small tan trench coat. Dean had never seen anyone wear something so strange.

"Are you a bird?"

"No. Are you?" The winged boy tilted his head looking bemused at Dean.

"No." Dean puffed out his chest. "I am Dean Winchester." His eyes widened. "Wait, I think I do know what you are!"

"You do?"

Dean nodded excitedly, practically dancing. "Come on!" He grabbed his hand pushed Sam's stroller back to the motel room as fast as he could. He pulled Sam out of the stroller and handed him to the baffled looking boy. Dean grabbed a book off of a shelf and shuffled through it quickly. "There."

Blue eyes met with earnest green ones before discovering what was on the page. It was a Precious Moments bible with cartoon angels that had impossibly large eyes and sweet, shy smiles. "You are an angel."

The angel nodded but look slightly put off at the picture. "I am an angel of the Lord, but I do not understand. Do you humans really think that we look…like that?"

Dean nodded earnestly. "You do."

The angel stood there holding Sam awkwardly. "Dean?"

"Yeah…what's your name?"

"Castiel," the angel murmured shyly.

Dean furrowed his brow. "Castiel. Castieeeeeeeel. Nice name. Can I call you Cas instead?"

Castiel blinked. "Are you making fun of me?"

"No, Cas just sounded cute to me." Dean placed the book back on the shelf as a light flush crept over the angel's cheek bones.

"Dean?"

"Yeah Cas?"

"Your bundle of…Sam smells bad."

Dean grinned. "I think Sam just laid a bomb. Okay stinker." Dean came over and gently lifted the bundle out of Castiel's hands. Castiel stood there stiffly as Dean hurried around the room changing Sam's diaper. He peeked around the room for a bit but kept glancing over at Dean.

"So what made you finally decide to show up?"

"Decide to show up?" Castiel blinked.

"Yeah. I needed you guys a looong time ago. And now you are here."

"Sorry Dean." Castiel looked down at his untied shoe. "I was just assigned to you. They must have thought that you did not need us yet."

"My mom needed you." Dean finished with the diaper and set Sammy down on his stomach on a blanket.

"For that I am sorry too."

"Why do you do that?" Castiel looked confused. "Why do you talk so fancy? And stop being sorry."

Castiel's wings wilted as he stood under Dean's scrutiny looking ready to break. "I'm sor-I don't know. I will go back and see if someone else can be assigned to you."

"Wait Cas. Hold on you son of a bitch!"

Castiel looked startled at Dean's language. Maybe he had shown up too late to save him. "No, you do not want me. I can go."

"No you can't." Dean reached over and grabbed Castiel's hand. "This time I'm sorry Cas. I didn't want to upset you. I'm glad you're my angel. I bet I got the best one."

Dean smiled down at him as Castiel gazed into his face with pure wonder. "You are?"

"Of course. Why would I lie about that? Look me in the eye and tell me if I'm lying." Dean made a squinty face at Castiel as the angel took a step back.

"You just look scary."

Dean grinned. "You're just a big chicken aren't you. I thought angels were supposed to be tough dudes with gigantic swords but you really are a Precious Moments angel, aren't you?"

"I'm whatever you need me to be, Dean." Castiel stood there rather stiffly, offended once more.

"Are all angel's like you?"

Castiel shook his head slowly. "No. The others don't really like me that much."

"Well they must be all be dumb sons of bitches then. I have a secret."

"You do?"

"Yeah, Cas. I don't really have any friends either. So how about we agree on being friends? Deal?" Dean held out his hand to Castiel.

Castiel looked perplexed. "I don't understand you Dean. Are you joking or serious?"

"I'm seriously joking." Castiel's face fell. "No! Cas, I do want you to be my friend. Honestly. Cross my heart and hope to die."

Castiel looked pale. "I hope you don't."

"Don't what?"

"Die." Castiel once more eyed the ground shyly.

Dean grinned and puffed out his chest importantly. "Well that is settled then. Oh and your shoe is untied."

Castiel nodded. "I think it is broken," he stated as if delivering the weather forecast.

"Nah I can fix it. Do you not know how to fix your shoes?"

Castiel rubbed the back of his neck looking embarrassedly at anything but Dean. "No." He looked defeated.

"Here. It's like on Spongebob. Loop-de-loop, and pull."

Castiel looked lost. "Spongebob?"

"It's a kid show. My mom always called them bunny ears, so that works too. The rabbit goes through the hole or something like that." Dean pushed Castiel into a sitting position and tied the laces looking focused. Castiel just sat there looking at Dean like he was the most amazing thing he had ever seen in his life. Dean did a double knot and they both sat there looking proudly at Dean's handiwork before locking eyes. Sammy started crying, breaking the spell.

"Looks like someone is hungry." Dean announced in a sing-song voice. "Hey Cas, wanna stay for dinner?" Castiel nodded and stood there, pleased. "Good." Dean hugged him and he stood there staring at Dean's chest in surprise. Dean passed a less smelly Sam over to him once more and began getting dinner ready. Castiel stood there holding the small baby in his arms as he stared happily at Dean's back. He knew in that moment that he had made the right choice. Dean was his and he rather like the idea of belonging to someone too, as long as that someone was Dean Winchester.


	2. Once Upon a Time

**Hey guys! Sorry it has been a loooooooooooong time, but now that I am on spring break I have time to write some more whooohoo! Thank you for all the reviews everyone, I loved 'em :)**

**JaredPadaleckiSPNFan-Thank you! Sorry it wasn't soon, but there is more to come!**

**Forbidden-lover1- Haha thanks! I can think of nothing cutie than a Weechester Dean and tiny Cas!**

**LooneyLunaLovesYou- Thanks :D **

**Ventorum- Haha yup Dean always has to be the tough leader guy. But it's not like Cas is much competition!**

**OneShotMarvel- Thank you very much for the lovely review! I agree Dean+ Cas= cutest thing ever! That's true, John is a crap dad, but he has great taste in music!**

**Darkphoenix2345- Awesome! I'm glad someone else could see that too!**

**Jordan- Thank you tres mucho!**

"Once Upon a Time"

Castiel had always wanted to be like his brothers; strong, emotionless, and proud. Being the youngest he had a hard time fitting in with the others and found himself at the butt of their jokes. He wondered if he would ever be given the opportunity to leave home for a mission just like the others. Something impressive smiting would sure show them. Castiel was surprised to find a significant lack in the smiting department when he was assigned to Dean. He often found himself learning how to properly care for same or playing pretend with Dean on a lonely afternoon. Sure he fought dragons and ghosts and monsters, but they were all born from Dean's very active imagination. And the worst part was that Castiel often found himself in the humiliating role of damsel.

Today Castiel was lucky enough to play sidekick as Dean zoomed across the yard importantly and Sam slept on a nearby threadbare blanket.

"Look out Cas! Here comes the ogre!"

Castiel narrowed his eyes as he squinted around in the sun. "Dean? I don't see one."

Dean smacked the back of his hand to his forehead. "There isn't really an ogre there!"

Castiel looked confused. "But you just-"

"I know Cas. We are _pretending _that there is an ogre there. Don't you angels know about anything? What the hell do you do all day up there?"

Castiel frowned. "What we are told to do." He looked at Dean as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

"My dad tells me what to do to, but when he's not here, it's fun time. Your dad isn't here so stop kissing his absent ass."

Castiel stood there looking blank. He wasn't sure that he knew how to do things that weren't directly assigned to him. "I see him."

"Who?" Now Dean looked perplexed.

"The ogre."

"Oh you are pretending to see one!" Dean grinned. "So what does it look like?"

"What?" Castiel looked uncomfortable. "Umm. It is a very…evil…shade of ogre."

"HAHA! Is that the best you got Cas?"

Castiel sighed and looked frustrated at Dean. "I don't know what an ogre looks like."

"Really? It's something everyone should know, in case, you know, if you see one." Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel and turned him towards the street. "See the fatty?"

Castiel peeked over at the gruff plumber-looking man and nodded. "I don't see how-"

"Cas, that's because you don't _try_ to see. Now. Imagine he is greenish gray, a bit lumpier, and has a club instead of a newspaper."

Castiel squinted at the man for a moment. "But he doesn't."

"Try it. Close your eyes."

Castiel closed his eyes and then opened them. "He still looks the same."

Dean sighed. "Okay Cas. We are going to have to give you some homework before we play again."

"Homework?"

"Yes. When you poof yourself home for the night you are going to have to work on growing an imagination."

"How do I do that?" Castiel looked confused and then focused intensely on the ground.

"What are you doing?" Dean grinned. "You're trying to grow an imagination, aren't you?" Castiel nodded solemnly and went back to concentrating as Dean's grin widened. "You work on that and keep an eye on Sammy, I will be right back."

Castiel sat on the blanket next to Sam and rested his chin on his arm as he felt a bit disappointed in himself. His brothers thought his job sounded like a cake walk, but they didn't even know the half of it. Things that were meant to be smitted did not make you look for invisible beings or grow imaginations. Sam woke up and started crying as Castiel looked down at him in a blind panic. His assignment from Dean was to watch Sam only, according to what Dean said, but Dean didn't seem to like it when Sam cried. Castiel awkwardly patted his screaming head for a moment but it didn't stop.

He copied the way Dean picked up Sam and held him as far away as possible as he fixed him with a worried eye. Sam laughed and Castiel looked confused. Feeling relieved that he solved the problem, Castiel set the baby back down only for Sam to start crying the instant he touched the blanket. Castiel squatted down and looked at him for a moment. He figured that Sam really wasn't that cute when he was crying. Castiel leaned in closer only to feel one of Sam's chubby hands gripping the delicate feathers of his left wing. He sat there feeling pain shoot through sensitive skin and then quickly lifted up the baby. Sam relaxed his iron grip and snuggled onto the angel's shoulder before yawning and closing his eyes sleepily.

Dean rooted through his mother's old hope chest and pulled out a large book from under his first photo album. Wedding photos were gently rearranged and every item put in an approximation of the right place. Dean knew that he wasn't supposed to be going through his mother's things, but as long as his father was away he could do what he wanted. John was often away. Dean spent countless hours sifting through keepsakes when John would leave him for a hunt. Sometimes he would point out things to little Sammy, like the photo of the time Dean and John built a tree house or the whole family out for an afternoon of fishing on the lake. Dean remembered what he was doing and quickly shut the chest and hurried back to the front yard.

Castiel was quietly holding a sleeping Sam; the baby's small fist clutching lightly at the soft feathers of a wing. Dean stood there smiling as the angel stood there looking mentally prepared to hold the baby until Dean came back, even if it took the entirety of the baby's nap. "Cas? Is he all the way asleep?" Castiel nodded quietly. "C'mon, let's get him in the crib."

They snuck quietly into the adjoining room that held a make shift bed for Sam in one of John's suit cases. It was the perfect size for a baby Sam's size, but Mary would have never allowed Sam to sleep in such a thing. Castiel carefully carried in the sleeping Sam. "Okay Cas, put him in the bed slowly," Dean whispered loudly. Castiel nodded and set down the sleeping baby with as much care as someone cutting a wire from a bomb. Dean grinned when he saw the angel peeking at the baby out of one eye.

"He is still asleep Dean!" Castiel covered his mouth in horror but the baby ignored his outburst and rolled over, still fast asleep. Dean placed a hand on the angel's shoulder and led him away from the room before slowly closing the door.

"Sorry Dean, I almost woke him up!" Castiel looked upset and his wings wilted.

Dean grinned. "Hey, no worries Cas. Sammy sleeps through anything." He ruffled Castiel's hair and the angel looked up almost cheerfully at him. "I found the book." Dean carried the heavy book over to a bed and set it down gently. Castiel stood there awkwardly as Dean sat down and started rifling through the pages.

"Uh Cas?"

"Yes Dean?" Castiel tilted his head to the side curiously.

"You can sit on the bed you know. Jesus Cas, you know I don't bite! It's Sam that does that."

Castiel nodded. He sure knew that Sam was a biter, having been bitten by him multiple times after knowing him for a little more than a week. "Of course Dean." Castiel sat stiffly on the bed next to Dean, but was as close to him as possible.

Dean glanced at him with a grin."Cas, you're a weirdo, you know that?"Castiel looked startled at him and more than a little upset. He fussed with the sleeves on his trench coat and tried to look anywhere but at Dean.

"Cas? Hey Cas, what's wrong? Haha you are a moody son of a bitch sometimes, huh?" Castiel sat there with his wings wilted as he tried to keep his face looking as cold as possible. "Cas? Are you really that mad? I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt your feelings!"

"My what?" Castiel looked stoic at Dean. "Angels do not express emotion. We are warriors of God, not humans."

"Sheesh, if you say so. But you totally are one emotional bundle of feathers, you know that Cas?" Castiel nodded, looking more upset than angry now.

"I know Dean, that is why I am not a very good angel."

"Cas, hey, Cas." Dean tried to fix him with a steely eye. "You need to stop being so hard on yourself all the time. I am sure you are great at doing a lot of angel things! Like….uhhh." Castiel peeked up at him. "Uhh…what is it exactly that angels do?"

"Soliders. All of us are the warriors of our father."

Dean looked excited. "And what isn't fun about that Cas? Kicking bad guy's asses and stuff?"

Castiel shrugged. "I don't know. I just don't seem to like it as much as my brothers do."

"Why?"

"I guess I want something else." Castiel peeked at Dean, waiting for him to laugh at him.

Instead Dean nodded and smiled. "See maybe you aren't such a sorry son of a bitch after all! You don't have to listen to your brothers all the time. See I want stuff to that I don't have."

"You do?" Castiel tilted his head curiously at him.

"Of course Cas." Dean laid back on the bed and pushed at the wall with his feet.

"What would you like Dean?"

Dean grinned. "Glad you asked. A cheese burger with extra bacon. Pronto."

Castiel looked confused at him. "So…that would make you happy?"

"Yeah, for a while. C'mon Cas. 'Sometimes it is about the little things.' Dean pushed with his socks, moving the bed away from the wall.

"If something cannot make you happy forever, why pursue it?"

"'Cause." Dean glanced at Castiel and rolled his eyes. "If you can't have something you really want, you have to try to make up for that. Cas, my mom is dead and I have no idea where my dad is. If I can forget about it for a while, I will."

Castiel glanced over at Dean looking confused. "So if something is missing….you find something else?"

"Yeah. That's why you are supposed to be my angel, I think. You're better than cheeseburgers." Dean opened up the book as Castiel sat there feeling something strange he could not place. His wings took on a soft glow of light as he sat next to Dean.

"Let's start with the story about King Arthur and his knights. Maybe it will give you a better idea of how to be a soldier so you can kick your brother's asses." Castiel offered a small smile as the two sat on Dean's bed and read through hours of stories together.

Sam began to cry in the other room and Dean sat up looking surprised. "Shit I forgot what time it was!"

Castiel sat up hugging the book. "No more stories?"

"Not now Cas. Dad is supposed to be here tonight. I got to make dinner."

Castiel nodded, all business once more. "Then I shall aid you."

Dean grinned. "Thanks Cas. Can you grab Sammy?"

Castiel nodded and put down the book before wandering back to the next room where the bawling Sam made him wince. Castiel covered his ears until he realized he couldn't block out the sound and pick up the baby at the same time. The angel lifted up the baby once more and carried him carried him over to Dean as the other boy began bustling around the kitchen, making spaghetti. Castiel watched him curiously as Dean hummed to himself and pulled out paper and plastic dinner ware from a cabinet.

"Is this your father's orders?" Castiel attempted to strap the wiggling Sam into a high chair like he ahd seen Dean do before.

"Nah. I just figure mom used make food whenever dad got home from a trip. Spaghetti is the only thing I know how to make that isn't in a can."

"In a can? Plants can't grow in there!" Castiel looked at Dean like he was the silliest thing in the world.

"Nope that can't Cas. Which is why stuff in a can tastes like all kinds of ass." Dean looked business-like as he stirred around the spaghetti sauce. "Try this." Castiel buckled the tray on the high chair and warily stood in front of Dean. "I'm not gonna kill you Cas." The angel nodded and opened his mouth obediently even though Dean could tell it was the last thing he wanted to do.

Castiel bit down on the spoon and nodded at Dean looking pleased. Then he tried to eat the spoon. "I liked it at first, but this part is not good."

"C'mon Cas, you don't want to hurt my feelings, do you?" Dean leaned against the counter and howled with laughter as Castiel continued to try to eat the spoon loyally. Dean leaned over and took the spoon away from the miserable angel. "Haha Cas, you are a total riot!"

"Dean, I said I would do it."

Dean eyed Castiel, now looking like the curious one of the pair. "Why? Did you think I would beat you up?"

Castiel shook his head. "No Dean, I'm not going to let you down."

Dean grinned. "Good to know. Cas, I'm sorry, you just are too funny sometimes!" Dean leaned in and hugged Castiel as the angel smiled happily back at him.

"Dean? Dean?" The sounds of John Winchester letting himself into the motel formed a delighted smile on Dean's face.

"Dad! In here!" Dean grinned and turned to look at the angel, who had already vanished. "Cas?" Dean looked around and didn't see him anywhere. "Where did that son of a bitch run off too?"

"Dean, help me unload the Impala."

"Coming daddy!" Dean turned off the stove and zoomed out to the car. He helped John carry in an assortment of old equipment and mended articles of clothing. "Guess what?" Dean frowned when his father didn't automatically respond. "Dad? Guess what?"

"Dean, give me a minute. It's been a long trip. If I get in the shower, can you bring in the rest of the stuff?" John ran his hand through his head tiredly.

Dean looked disappointed but nodded. "Okay dad, I will tell you when you get out!"

"I'm sure you will," John muttered as he ruffled Dean's hair and kissed Sammy on the forehead before wandering into the bathroom.

Dean lugged in a tackle box and jacket before he saw the bottles of whiskey in the back. Dean stood there and bit his lip for a minute before deciding to leave those in the car. The past months had taught him that they were never a good sign.

John wolfed down dinner as Dean got Sammy ready for bed. Dean hurried back into the room where his father had already begun his first bottle. 'Son of a bitch.' Dean had tried hiding them under a tarp but his dad was still better at him when it came to finding things, even if he was out of practice at hide-and-go seek.

"Dad! I made a friend."

John looked tiredly at his empty glass before setting it down and took a swig out of the bottle instead." That's nice Dean."

Dean eyed him. Normally he got in trouble for talking to strangers. "His name is Cas, and he is an actual angel! He is not very good at a lot of things but I am teaching him to be better. I think we are best friends now, but I have to ask him about that first." Dean rambled on excitedly as he did his best impersonation of the angel and looked as stiff and stoic as possible at his father.

"So where is he Dean?" John smiled at his son who looked grateful for the attention.

"He left, I think he is shy."

"Maybe I can meet him some day."

Dean nodded enthusiastically. "I'm sure you will love him! I do!" Dean zoomed across the room with his arms behind his back, pretending to fly as his dad's attention returned to the bottle and the news on the small, crappy TV.

Dean crawled up on the bed and sat down next to his father. "He didn't even know what a fairy tale was, can you believe that? I had to read to him some out of mom's book-"

"You what? Dean what did I tell you about messing with your mother's stuff?"

Dean looked quite small and scared in that moment. "I…uuuhh…no?" He hoped the right answer would get him off of the hook.

"Exactly Dean. I don't want you to ruin her things, do you understand me?"

"But she doesn't need them anymore!"

John's eyes blazed. "Dean, your mother is dead and that is all we have left of her damn it!"

Dean looked up at him quietly. "I know, but sometimes I don't think you do."John smacked Dean across the face as the boy fell back in horror. Dean rushed past him as he felt tears running down his face.

"Dean? Dean! I'm sorry…" John came after him only to find a quivering lump under the covers of the bed. John sighed and awkwardly patted Dean on the back before wandering back to his own bed. Both Dean and John stared up at the same ceiling for hours as night time swallowed the small family whole and drew shadows between their lonely beds.


	3. Growing Pains

**Man I am on a roll this week, second story updated :D Sorry it has been so long for an update, I just got caught up in writing one of my other stories. Here is your next chapter, enjoy. Thank you very much reviewers! You guys are seriously awesome and I LOVE getting reviews. Go ahead and leave anonymous ones if you don't have an account, I would love to get them :)**

**Ventorum, angelinadirtytrenchcoat, RejectedShyRebel18- thank you for reviews!**

"Growing Pains"

The night refused to end. Dean lay in bed until he heard his father's snoring. He sat up and got out of bed, quietly slipping into a jacket and shoes before he snuck out of the front door. It was cold but Dean no longer felt like the world was closing in on the small, trashy motel room. Dean took a deep breath as he stared up at the stars.

"Cas? Hey Cas….it's Dean." Dean glanced around the dirty parking lot as thunder rolled in the distance. He tucked his hands in his pockets, hoping that the angel would hear him. "Please zap your feathery butt down here, I need you." Dean pulled his hoodie over his hair as he felt the rain begin to start up once more.

"Dean." Castiel stood in front of the small boy looking reverent. "You called?"

Dean glared at him, fists balled in furry. "Yeah, a long damn time ago! What did you have your angel radar shut off or something?"

"I…I do not understand…I-"

"I NEEDED YOU IN THERE!" Dean shouted in the startled angel's face.

Castiel looked entirely upset. "I apologize Dean. I am under strict orders that I am not to be seen by adults. I really am sorry." Castiel stood there awkwardly as Dean slipped his hands into his pockets and eyed him.

"Alright Cas. I believe you. But how are you supposed to help me if you can't zap in when I really need it?"

"I am sorry Dean."

Dean looked away and shook his head. "Yeah I got that."

"Is it still not customary for humans to apologize after a fault?" Castiel tilted his head quizzically at Dean.

"It is but it still doesn't fix everything. Why can't you zap in when my Dad is here?"

Castiel squinted at him like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "It is an order. Michael says that if everyone knows we exist they will ask for favors all the time."

"And what is wrong with that? Yesterday I prayed for a sandwich and didn't get it."

Castiel tilted his head to the side as he eyed Dean quietly. "That is the point."

"What is?"

"You need us but not for things like sandwiches. I am a warrior of God Dean."

Dean grinned. "Man I should have gotten a chick angel. Then she would make me sandwiches allll the time."

"And why is that?" Castiel looked confused as Dean rolled his eyes.

"You know, you really are sorta boring." Castiel frowned and turned away from Dean. "It's cool that you are a soldier though. Do you get to carry around guns and stuff?"

Castiel looked a bit embarrassed and glanced away from Dean. "I'm actually not a soldier yet."

"You're not?"

"No." Castiel kicked at a rock sadly. "I can't become one until I prove myself."

Dean peeked down at Castiel as the angel refused to meet his eye. "Is it because you are just a baby?"

Castiel looked crabby at Dean. "I am not a baby." He began to march away but Dean grabbed his shoulder before he could leave.

"Cas, I know you aren't a baby. You sure kicked that ogre's butt the other day."

Castiel frowned. "The ogre wasn't real."

"Yeah but if it was I'm sure you could have kicked its butt." Dean smiled at Castiel and grinned wider when Castiel gave him a smile in return.

"I did burn him into a…crisp as you say."

Dean nodded eagerly. "Yep. Just like a French fry that falls in the oven. A crisp." Castiel laughed and covered his mouth in surprise. "What?"

Castiel shook his head as he continued laughing until tears started in his eyes. "I-I can't stop Dean!" He sat in the middle of the parking lot as Den grinned and tackled him.

"You must be out of practice from being so grumpy all of the time!" Dean tickled him and he tried to breathlessly escape.

"Dean stop it!" Castiel tried to push Dean away which of course only made the unruly boy more excitable. Castiel talked Dean and sat on his chest observing him quietly as he attempted to look severe and imposing. "No more."

Dean responded by snatching up the angel and spinning him in a circle before setting him down. They stood nose to nose for a few moments as they attempted to catch their breath. Castiel could see every freckle on Dean's nose and couldn't help feeling delighted at being so close to him. Dean's grin grew as Castiel felt his face flush. Suddenly Dean pushed him and zoomed across the parking lot.

"Tag you're it!" Dean shot around in a circle until he realized that Castiel was standing there looking absolutely baffled at him. "Come on Cas. This is called 'tag'. I run, you chase, roger that?"

"Who is Rodger?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Just chase me okay? If you tag me it gets to be your turn to run."

Castiel nodded looking serious as if he were being assigned a classified, dangerous mission instead of playing a game with the only friend he had in the world. He appeared next to Dean and pushed him looking pleased with himself.

"Cas! No fair! That's cheating!" Dean pushed Castiel back as the angel looked bewildered back at him. "You can't zap okay?"

Castiel sighed audibly before nodding and running after Dean with his white wings trailing behind him. They hid behind broken down cars, overfilled dumpsters, someone's thrown out couch. The rain came off and on and when a down pour began Dean stopped and stood spinning in a circle with his arms flung out wide and his tongue out. Castiel mirrored him and forgot to think of how ridiculous he probably looked.

"Dean? Are you out there? Dean?" John walked out of the motel room in search of his missing son.

"Son of a bitch. Sorry Cas, I need to jet. See you tomorrow?"

Castiel nodded as he felt a loneliness creep up inside him. He had sort of hoped that the night would never end. He looked surprised when he felt Dean lean over and give him a quick kiss on the cheek. Dean rushed back into the motel after his father as Castiel slowly lifted a hand to his cheek, face burning. Castiel stood outside in the rain for a long time with his arms wrapped around himself as he felt the happiest feeling he had ever known rushing through his body. Without thinking about it Castiel started spinning around the parking lot by himself.

"It seems that you are enjoying your assignment after all Castiel." Castiel whirled around and stopped dead in his tracks when he locked eyes with Zachariah.

"I…" Castiel bowed his head as he felt his face flush once more, but this time out of embarrassment.

Zachariah gave him an oily smile. "Don't be embarrassed kid. It's alright to enjoy your job. I just want to make sure you are doing an adequate job.

Castiel smiled earnestly up at the older angel who looked surprised to see the normally stoic angel looking so…emotional. "I assure you that Dean Winchester will continue to be safe. I just worry about his father…" Castiel fussed with the sleeve of his coat.

"What that his going to kill his own little bastard? I don't believe he will."

Castiel shook his head quickly. "No. I do not mean it that way. He just doesn't make Dean happy enough."

Zachariah eyed him for a moment before bursting out laughing. The small angel looked startled up at him. "Happy? Who gives a crap if the boy is happy? Dean's safety only needs to go so far as to protect him from bodily harm. Any emotional scarring is not part of your job listing."

Castiel eyed the ground quietly. "He was scared and I couldn't help him. Can I please go to Dean to help if his father attempts to hurt him again?"

"Of course not. We don't want a hunter to figure out what we are up too. Humans don't know we really exist and even if they think we do they have made up insane stories that we are caring cherubs who give a damn if they have every material item they want. We follow our orders and obey. You have an order, so obey it."

Castiel's wings wilted as he stood in the cold rain wishing he was brave enough to ignore a direct order. He wished he could have called Zachariah a 'son of a bitch' before he ganked him. Something Dean would have done. Dean really was the brave one and Castiel couldn't help but feel useless to someone so brave and all around perfect.

"Listen kid. You want to be a soldier, leader of your own garrison someday? Huh?" Castiel nodded quietly. "Well if you don't learn to follow orders now, you won't be a very good soldier, will you?"

"Dean says that good leaders don't take or listen to shit from anyone." Castiel looked slightly defiant up at the other angel as he watched a tightness form around his eyes and mouth.

"I like you. I really do. But all this jabbering? It needs to stop. I always thought you knew how to keep that rap of yours shut? Here's some advice: stop mimicking Dean Winchester. You are not a leader. You are a weak little angel that does what he is told. Come on, it is time to get back to heaven." Castiel followed silently behind him as he felt stubborn tears starting at the corners of his eyes.

.

"Oh look it's Cassie!" Balthazar grinned at Uriel who barley flicked an eye back at him. "How's the baby sitting job little brother?"

Castiel was tempted to tell him about how he and Dean had fought an imaginary ogre. How Sammy had started crawling the day before or that he was the happiest in his life. He ignored the usual cautious voice inside his head that kept him silent and observant. He forgot the hideous speech of Zachariah as he excitedly mimicked what he and Dean had been up to. Other angels crowded around watching their stoic baby brother smile and chatter away happily.

"Looks like someone has a bit of a crush." Raphael smiled coldly down at Castiel as he ignored a sharp look from Anna.

"Leave him alone Raphael."

"He won't learn to be a proper soldier with silly ideas like that in his head."

Anna grasped his shoulder. "Please Raphael. He's young and has time before he has to be one of us. Let him live before-"

"Before what? Are you still following your own trail of disobedience? If so you may not get the position of power you've currently been eyeing." Anna quietly stood there even though something told her that this was wrong.

"Castiel?" The small tousle headed angel turned and stared up at the angel with wide blue eyes. "It seems you are getting rather attached to your charge."

Castiel nodded slowly. "Yes. I feel as if I am where I am supposed to be. I haven't done wrong?" Castiel glanced around at the others as Anna and Gabriel looked away.

"Nothing you have realized on your own Castiel. You just haven't learned yet. Do not worry Castiel. We are here to help you."

Castiel smiled gratefully around at the others looking small in his trench coat. "Thank you."

"Of course, what else is family for?"

.

"Dean, where were you?"

Dean sighed as he sat on the foot of the bed. "Outside." He looked rather sullen.

"I know that Dean. I'm not angry. I know you like to go out there when you get upset. I do the same thing too."

"You do?" Dean sat a bit closer to his father. John smiled fondly down at his son and put back up the bottle of amber liquid in the cabinet instead of pouring a glass. Dean looked relieved.

"Yes. Just make sure you are careful out there."

Dean nodded. "Of course. I had all of my switchblades on me and the gun in my jacket."

John ruffled his hair. "That's my boy."

Dean scooted all the way over to his father and rested his head against his shoulder. "Dad?"

"Yeah Dean?"

Dean bit his lip before snuggling closer to his father. "Why can't we always be like this? If there are so many monsters out there, why can't they just gank each other?"

John smiled fondly but felt a flash of grief pour through his body. It was moments like these when he realized how lonely and scared his son was. Dean was a boy and he was raising him to be a hunter while his childhood lay forgotten on the back porch. Toy trucks were ignored for helping his father get stolen cars to run again. A plastic pistol for another boy held real ammunition for the older Winchester child. A book of stories lay under a bed that would likely be located in a different cheap motel the next week. The contents of the book would fuel imaginings of creatures that looked tame compared to the nightmares that Dean knew lurked in the shadows.

"I don't know Dean. But sometimes we have to sacrifice things for others. If I didn't do what I do now then who knows how many people would have died in some horrible manner?"

Dean sat there quietly as he listened to his Dad's usual speech for self-sacrifice. "I know Dad. But why don't they all save themselves? I already know to look out for other people. Today Cas and I were supposed to be making dinosaur masks but Sammy couldn't sleep. We had to watch him drooling around instead." Dean picked at a frayed string on the sleeve of his jacket.

John smiled and hugged Dean to his chest. "Don't worry Dean. I know how hard you work all the time and I want you to know that I am proud of you. Do you understand?" Dean nodded as he heard little Sammy sounding fussy from the other room.

"I'd better get him, he's probably hungry."

John frowned. "It's alright Dean. Leave him alone and he will go right back to sleep."

Dean shook his head. "Not when he does _this _type of crying." Dean hurried over to the kitchen as John rested his head on his hands. His son was six years old and he was better at being a father then he was.

When Dean finally got Sammy settled he hurried back to his father's side of the room only to find him asleep. Dean let the feeling of disappointment overcome him as he buried into the covers of his own bed. It wasn't often that he was able to spend time with his father when he wasn't drunk and those moments were treasured by him. In the morning John would be gone and Dean would have to wait for him to wander back in more likely with a half empty bottle of hard alcohol than not.

.

Castiel tried to sit up and back away as he covered his bleeding face in shock. Everywhere hurt and the faces of the other angels looked blurry to him. He got up halfway only to collapse under his own shaking legs. "Why?" A small hand stopped the flow of blood from a broken nose.

"Because Castiel, you need to learn what will happen when you disobey your orders. You were disrespectful to a senior ranking angel and have been going some…unauthorized extra credit on the job. Keep Dean Winchester alive and nothing more or we will find someone more capable for the job."

Castiel looked wide eyed around at his siblings as each and every one of them refused to meet his questioning eyes. He hurried away from them to find himself in his favorite place in heaven. The man flew his kite as a summer breeze took it swiftly in the air. Castiel curled up near a bed of flowers as he waited for his body to heal and his heart to stop hurting.


	4. Remember the Alamo

**Here is the next chapter (insert 'you don't say' face here.) Thank you sooooooo much for the reviews, you guys are awesome!**

**Thank you: xpercyx, Luciel89, darkphoenix2345, La-p'tite-tete, roxxroj, Ventorum, and Miss Light Bright for the reviews. THANK YOU! Haha those motivated me to get back to work on this story again. Chemistry hmwk can wait ;)**

"**Remember the Alamo"**

Over the next month the boy and his angel became inseparable. Games could no longer be played alone. A chair held memories of times the boys were transported into Dean's book of fairy tales. Notched sticks were left behind at every motel no longer the blades of fearless knights. Hot wheel cars and make shift ramps out of old cardboard littered a kitchen only to be packed up once more. Dean had never really had a friend before. Sammy was the closest he had but the little stinker had only barely started to say some words. Cas was something different. He was loyal to a fault and tramped after Dean in the midst of every imaginary adventure. When things weren't so good at home they escaped out of the over-painted walls of the latest Winchester "home." The Colorado summer was cooler than most and living things poked their heads out of patches of shade to escape the chill. John was off hunting the rumor of a werewolf and the boys were left to their own devices once more.

Castiel hurried after Dean with Sammy nestled in a baby carrier that rested against his chest. Sammy kicked his legs happily as the angel jumped over a log and slowly made his way through a creek. Cold water splashed at his ankles but the warmth of the sun countered it.

"Hurry up Cas! We need to see if my fort is still here!" Dean crunched over dead leaves and spooked a family of birds.

"When was the last time you were here?"

"February. I am gonna be pissed if it's gone. You have to see it Cas!" Dean scratched at a bug bite on his leg as Castiel spied around them. It was a calm afternoon but the birds hadn't yet taken a break from singing. Castiel rested his chin on Sammy's head as he watched Dean march around muttering to himself.

"If there is no fort here Dean, should we just build another?"

Dean looked thoughtful for a moment before his face broke into a huge grin. "Good idea Cas!" Castiel looked pleased and smiled happily at Dean.

"How do we begin?"

"It is all about the location." Dean looked serious at Cas, ready to pass on some of his impressive knowledge to him. "We need a good tree and we want to be close to the river, but not too close."

Castiel nodded as he began to glance around the site. "This one Dean?"

"Nah, that tree is waaaaay too skinny. This one. See how there are all those branches at the bottom? That makes building easier."

The boys trekked back and forth to the chosen building plot with arms full of broken braches. Their pile of debris began to grow as the sun reached its peak in the sky. Dean wiped a hand over his forehead as he grinned at Cas. "Time to get started building."

The work was tiring for the two small boys. According to Dean, everything had to be just right and Castiel complied as usual. Branches were tied to the base of the tree with thin green reeds still wet from the creek. Soon cold clumps of pine needles were added to cover the wooden skeleton.

"I bet you anything that if we patch this up real good then the rain won't get in it later! Then next time we are here our fort will be here."

Castiel smiled as Dean chattered away. He always loved when Dean mentioned future endeavors that included the angel. Sometimes he was afraid that Dean might forget to call him down from heaven or that someone else would be better at the games of imagination Dean loved to play. Here Dean was smiling at him, and Castiel could not wish for anything else in the world. They spent hours shooting at each other with curiously curved sticks while Sam sunk new teeth into an apple. Tired and sweaty, they moved by the river.

"Dean?"

"Yeah Cas?"

Castiel bit his lip as the other boy plopped down by the river bank. "We are friends, correct?"

"Well duh. Best friends."

"Best friends?"

Dean smiled as he skipped a rock across the roaring water. "Best friends. Come over here and let me show you how to do this. I'm awesome at this." Sam screeched happily as he reached towards the skipping rock with chubby arms.

Castiel nodded looking pleased as he sat shoulder to shoulder with Dean. "And we will always be friends? Forever?" He handed the baby a rock and Sam proceeded to slobber all over it.

"Not unless you crap out on me. Nope. It looks like you are stuck with me." Dean launched a rock as far as it would go, starting a rather disgruntled looking frog. "Get out of the way Kermit!"

"I am glad to be…stuck with you. Maybe I should just stay with you and not my brothers?" Castiel tossed a rock at the water and looked upset when it sunk to the bottom.

"What and not be a soldier? Here, use a flat rock, not a gigantor."

Castiel took the smooth stone in his hand as its cold dampness sank into his palm. "I am not sure that I want to be anywhere you aren't Dean."

Dean grinned. "Of course you wouldn't. That is rule one in being best friends. We got to stick together, no matter what."

"I promise to stick together with you Dean."

"And I promise to stick together with you Cas." The angel smiled softly at him before leaning over and planting a soft kiss on the freckled boy's nose.

"What was that for?" Dean ears went a bit pink.

"You do that to Sam since you care for him."

Dean grinned. "So you like me?"

Castiel nodded solemnly. "Of course Dean." He threw the rock in his hand and looked delighted as it skipped along the once still water leaving ripples in its wake.

"It's starting to get dark." Castiel nodded miserably, knowing that it meant that he needed to leave.

"Before we go I want to make sure that we mark our fort so that everyone knows it's ours." Dean dug a pocket knife out of his jacket as he carved three initials into the tree. One for each boy. "That'll keep those bears out."

Castiel smiled as he wrapped his arms around baby Sam. His head drooped a bit and he looked sleepy. He complained softly as Dean passed him a sippy cup. They rolled up their pant legs and waded through the water once more. Three small forms found their way out of the tangle of pines and into civilization. Cas found himself dragging his feet as they neared the motel.

"You know Cas, you can always spend the night. Dad won't be home." Dean glanced hopefully over at the angel.

"I am sorry Dean. I wish I could stay."

"Me too. So you _should _stay."

Castiel glanced at his friend's eager face and felt tempted to stay. "I am not supposed to be out of heaven for this long. I am already late."

"Good. So if you are late anyway, don't go. Those angels have no right bossing you around all the time."

Castiel looked unsure. "I don't know Dean…"

"Well I do. It's settled. Our first slumber party begins…" Dean mimed looking at a watch on his wrist "Now!" Castiel nodded excitedly and zoomed after him into the dark motel room.

After a messy dinner of pizza Sam squealed happily as Castiel spun around the room with Dean, hands clasped. Dean turned on the radio and Castiel let baby Sammy loose. Sam crawled as fast as he could towards one of the beds were he proceeded to pull himself into a standing position.

"Dean!" Castiel pointed to the baby excitedly and Dean grinned happily.

"Look at you Sammy!" Sam bent his knees to the music as the other boys cracked up.

"What is he doing Dean?" Castiel looked at the baby like he was the most hilarious thing in the world.

"Haha trying to bust a move. Shake that diaper butt!" Dean danced around his little brother.

"Dass, dass!"

"Yeah, you're dancing bro!" Dean threw Sammy up into the air and caught him boys danced around the room to the blaring radio, occasionally jumping up and down on one of the unmade beds. Sammy looked sleepy and rested his head on the floor as Dean breathlessly bounced off of a bed.

"Come here you wild little son of a bitch. Bed time." Sam yawned and Dean yawned just as widely since he was also a little boy who had stayed up past his bed time. Dean scooped up the baby and smiled when Sam rested his head on his shoulder, small hand gripping his shirt. Dean tried to walk him towards his suitcase-crib but the baby started crying.

"If he is tired was does he not just sleep?" Castiel looked perplexed at the rather crabby baby.

"He was having too much fun." Dean softly rocked the baby around in a circle as Castiel watched looking rather lonely. "C'mere Cas." Castiel stepped over to the other boy and Dean wrapped one arm around him, the other tucked under the sleepy Sammy's bottom. Castiel hugged Dean and they stood their quietly as the baby began to close his eyes. Dean had another failed attempt at sneaking his baby brother back into his bed.

"He must be lonely." Castiel carried Sam over to one of the larger beds and nestled against a pillow with Sam cuddled against his chest. He reached out a hand to Dean and the other boy smiled and took it. The boys cuddled around the sleeping baby and Castiel wrapped his soft wings around the three of them. The make shift family soon fell asleep with the rare comfort of having someone else there.

Castiel awoke in surprise as he felt Dean snoring next to him and Sammy chewing on the wing that was covering him. His eyes watered in pain but he bit his lip so he wouldn't wake up Dean. Castiel softly escaped from the embrace and carried Sam into the kitchen. He dug around for a clean bottle but couldn't find one. Soon he was up to his elbows washing the other bottles as Sam clung onto him like a baby monkey. Castiel found the jug of milk in the fridge and smiled as Sam bounced delightedly, arms reaching towards the milk. He filled up the bottle and handed it to the baby. Castiel carried him around humming softly until Sam tossed the bottle with a delighted shriek.

"Bwrd!" Castiel glanced down at the baby confused. "Bwrd"! Sam waved his arms around. Castiel turned around and frowned when he saw Uriel standing in the kitchen looking disgusted at what he saw. Cas was wearing Dean's slightly too long Batman pajamas, his hair a mess. Sam was cuddled safely in his arms.

"What is this abomination? Put down that hairless ape Castiel."

"No." Castiel looked apologetic as Uriel glared at him. "If I put him down he will cry."

"And why should that matter to me?"

Castiel looked surprised at him. "That would be that he was sad."

Uriel laughed as Castiel hugged the baby closer. "He's a human," Uriel sneered. "Last time I checked your assignment wasn't to become a wife to a six year old boy. Just wait until I tell Raphael about this!" Castiel's face fell. He tried to ignore Uriel as he picked up the bottle off of the floor and handed it to Sammy once more.

"And is your assignment to spy on Cas, you chuckle head? Sounds like someone is low on the angel food chain." Dean barged in looking overprotective.

"And this must be Dean Winchester."

Dean bared his teeth at him in a proud smile. "Yup and you must be a dick." Uriel looked slightly put off by the small boy's language. "Leave Cas alone."

"Cas! Cas!" Sam gripped on a wing once more as Castiel winced.

"How far you have fallen brother." Uriel shook his head as Dean glared up at him and Sam threw his bottle right into his face.

"Haha serves you right for being such an ugly and mean son of a bitch!" He glanced at Castiel. "I thought all angels were supposed to be pretty? Well you are pretty…damn ugly!" Dean cracked up and Castiel couldn't help but smile too.

"Watch your mouth you little piece of filth. It is time to come home Castiel, the others aren't happy with you." Castiel handed Sam back to Dean quietly.

"Wait, where are you taking him? You'd better not hurt him!" Dean rushed after the angels as the disappeared. "You hurt him and I will gank your sorry chicken ass!"

.

"I have him brother." Uriel dragged Castiel in by the arm as the little angel went limp. Fear could be easily read in his blue eyes and he had to fight to keep his bottom lip from trembling.

"I thought you had learned your lesson Castiel. Do you remember what was discussed last time you were here at the council?" Raphael leaned towards his brother who took a few steps back.

"My apologies. I did not mean to disobey…and I do not need another lesson." Castiel tried to sneak off through the crowd but another angel gripped his shoulders and moved him back into the center of the room.

"It seems that you will need more time to figure this out Castiel. I would rather not do this but you haven't left me a choice." Raphael placed his hand on the small angel's forehead and Castiel felt his knees go weak.

"What-what are you doing?" Castiel tried to frantically push his brother away as a coldness crept through him. His wings stopped glowing and his head felt strange and light. He took the beating like usual and spit out a mouthful of blood. Raphael lowered his hand when Castiel curled into a small ball on the ground. He whimpered and waited for his body to heal itself. Nothing happened.

Anna went over to her youngest brother and pulled him into her arms. "Raphael, this is ridiculous! He doesn't deserve this harsh of a punishment!"

"Come one Raphie, give him his Grace back. I think Cas has got the point." Balthazar took a step back as Raphael glanced coldly at him.

"Step back Anna." Anna waited for a moment and was about to go back when she felt the sobs racking through her baby brother's body.

"No Raphael. Give him back his Grace." Raphael snapped his finger and Anna disappeared.

"Anyone else care to go where she is going? I am betting that none of you would like it…" Stone faced angels stood with their hands to their sides quietly waiting for more orders. A few looked pained at the bleeding angel on the ground but they had their orders.

"Castiel, I know you do not see the justice in this and that is why I am afraid for you. It is dangerous to become so close to your charge."

Castiel spit out more blood as he attempted to regain his footing. "Why? Because he loves me? Because Dean would never do something like this? You are not my family. Dean and Sam are my family." He raised a small hand to his broken jaw and fought the tremor of pain. He would not cry for Raphael any more.

The angels looked surprised at their brave little Cas, no longer so meek and shy. Most of them had never heard so many words come out of his mouth at once.

"No Castiel." Raphael looked coldly down at him. "It is because you love Dean." Castiel looked confused. "What do you think will happen when the Winchesters no longer need you? When they are old enough to look after each other? Do you know why so many humans on earth have no idea that we exist?"

"We spend all our time hiding away." Castiel tried to ignore Raphael's comments. He didn't want him to see how deeply they hurt him. But the fear in his wide blue eyes gave him away.

"Wrong again. It is because they chose to forget us when they grow older. When the real world calls, every single human has answered. When they grow up they have no time for the silly games you and your Winchesters get up too. They forget. Dean will forget."

Castiel looked stricken at his brother, tears once more running down his face. "No! Dean would never forget me. He can't!" Castiel swayed on his feet before sinking down slowly onto the ground as the pain made him feel nauseous. He was left alone once more with only the fears of losing Dean to keep his reeling mind company.

He heard a soft voice call to him in the night and smiled as Dean prayed a message to him. "_I hope you are alright Cas, if those dick angels made you cry then I will gank all of 'em!"_

"_I know Dean. Dean?"_

"_Yeah Cas?"_

"…_you are sure that we will be friends…forever?"_

"_Yeah you dumb son of a bitch. I promised, didn't I? And we Winchesters never break our promises!"_

Castiel smiled softly. He needed to trust Dean. His best friend would never leave him. He had promised. And Castiel now trusted and loved Dean above anyone else in the world.


	5. The End of Summer

**Hey gang! Here is your next chapter, enjoy! Thank you for all the reviews, alerts, and favoriting :)**

**Thanks to: Miss Light Bright, darkphoenix2345, xPercyx, & Just Judy for reviewing. Thank you all very much and to quote Dean in Yellow Fever "You're awesome." **

"The End of Summer"

The games that are played by children become lost as the years pass. Sometimes a steady drop in imagination is at fault. Sometimes it is time to lie down and let the real world swallow such foreign and beautiful worlds. Years go by and some things get lost. An old baseball was buried in the field that once was the high class stadium of two little boys and a baby. A shoe was once taken swiftly away by a stream. The owner of that little shoe would never return there again. A juniper that was once a fierce dragon was trimmed back into an ordinary tree before beetles took it away in a hot summer. Butterflies that spent a spring being chased fell to the earth to make room for the small worms that hid under green leaves.

Things were left behind with the intention of replacing them. Memories would grow dimmer even as the years built more. The childhood of the Winchesters was threatened from an early time. An absent father and evil world would of course do such a thing. A gun lay under a motel pillow instead of a baby tooth. Advertisements in a newspaper served as cheap coloring books and not many models escaped without a sharpie moustache.

Dean loved the hours spent with his angel and sweet little Sammy. If John didn't notice him or forgot to call most nights, Castiel was there. Dean didn't have to question the fact that Cas loved him more than anything. That was how things were supposed to be with your best friend in the entire world. It was all about the little things. Sammy started to wear pull-ups and the little family celebrated. Little was thought of the past. The future lay ahead in the form of melting ice cream sandwiches and swings made from old branches. But also hidden in the future was the death of the world of children as other things became more important.

"Cas?"

"Yes Dean?" Castiel passed a freshly filled juice cup over to Sammy as the toddler wandered into his waiting arms.

"Uncle Bobby says that I haffta to go to school."

"School?" Castiel tilted his head to the side quizzically.

Dean threw a football into the air and caught it. "Yeah. I need to do some learning. Something called an "education."

"What does your dad say?"

"He said I got to go. Sammy will have to go to day care during the day and I get real lessons."

Castiel glanced at Dean with a worried frown as Sammy hugged him around the neck. "Why don't you just stay here? I will give you an…education if you really want one. Where do you find such things?"

"Haha! Sorry Cas, but you are probably too dull of a crayon to teach anyone about anything." Castiel's wings wilted. "Awww Cas, you know that I'm just joking."

"You are?"

Dean grinned. "Of course. I will even let you choose which crayon you want to be!" Dean dumped out a box of Crayolas as Castiel eyed him curiously. He scribbled a drawing of a boy with wings on the wall along with a not so artistic rendition of himself and Sammy.

"Dean?"

"Yeah Cas?"

Castiel looked a bit worried. "I don't want to be a crayon." He eyed the peeling wrapper and the way Sammy bit one in half.

"Well then don't be one." Dean went back to work on the wall. Castiel stared at him for a minute more before drawing alongside Dean. Soon Sammy got creative with squiggles as well.

Castiel stood back and eyed their work looking a little disgusted by it while Dean looked proud. "Now that is art!"

"I am not so sure Dean. You look like a dinosaur." He eyed the drawing of Dean with his spikey hair and too wide of a smile. Little stick arms waved.

Dean frowned, "Well looks like Picasso got a hold of your crayon." Castiel looked at what he had drawn and nodded. Dean looked about as well drawn as one of the felt friends off of _Blues Clues. _He had discovered something else he wasn't very good at.

"When do you go to school Dean?"

Dean squinted as he counted in his brain. "In about a month."

Castiel looked as if Dean had just been given a death sentence. He sat on one of the beds quietly as he felt rather sick. "Do you have to go every day?"

Dean nodded as Castiel looked more upset. "Well almost every day. Those sons of bitches are some harsh leaders, eh? They'd better not try and boss me around all day."

"They won't. I am sure that you will be the one bossing them around."

"Cas, are you calling me bossy?"

Castiel shook his head. "No. I am calling you a good leader."

Dean looked extremely pleased. "I am, aren't I?"

"Yes." Castiel fixed the pillow case that Dean had shucked off of a pillow. He brushed a hand across his eyes.

"Are you sad Cas?" Castiel shook his head but didn't turn around. "C'mon Cas. I won't be gone forever. I get weekends off."

"My apologies Dean." Castiel wiped away more tears but they wouldn't stop.

"Hey, don't be sorry about crying. It makes you less tough then me but it's okay." Castiel gave Dean a watery smile as the boy wrapped him in his arms.

"I feel like I miss you already."

Dean smiled against the shorter boy's unruly hair. "Hey. I'm gonna miss you too. But I promise that every day I come home from school we can hang out. Then I will teach you what I learned in school!"

Castiel looked perkier. "You promise?"

"Yeah Cas, I won't ever lie to you." Castiel hugged him tighter as he felt Sammy's little arms wrap around his leg. Here was where he was supposed to be and he could feel it already slipping away.

The next month passed by all too quickly. It was very warm in most of the states that John took them to. He dropped Dean off in a rental house with cash for some school supplies and things to live off of. The boy and his angel spent every possible second together. The last day of summer break appeared warm as ever but with a hint of Autumn in the air.

"Cas, are you ready to swim today?"

Castiel shook his head slowly. "I am still not sure Dean." He eyed the large pool of water with trepidation.

"Okay Cas. Remember the book we read? _Hooray for Pig_?"

"Yes. But I still do not see the correlation between me and…a pig."

Dean took in a deep breath and held back an eye roll. "It's cause Pig refused to learn how to swim because he was scared. He finally did it and then he got to swim with his friends instead of bumming around on the bank."

"I was not 'bumming around' Dean." Castiel sat moodily next to the water has he let a dragon fly crawl over the stick he had been poking at it with.

"Damn it Cas you don't have to be such a buzz kill."

Castiel squinted at Dean looking crabby. "I don't understand that reference."

"It means that the face you're making could kill a bee." Castiel threw the stick at Dean as the blond boy laughed and ducked.

Sammy threw the stick he was holding as well. "Bwee!" The toddler looked proud at the now unsettled water.

Dean hurried over and lifted up a very startled Castiel. "Dean put me down! Dean!"

Castiel caught sight of the other boy's wicked grin and looked at him with wide terror filled eyes. "Come on Pig, the water's fine!" Dean tossed his friend into the warm water and cracked up when the boy resurfaced and splashed about angrily.

"Dean! I'm dying!" Castiel flailed about like a drowning bird as his wings and arms created a miniature wave pool.

Dean grinned at Sammy as the toddler reached his arms out towards the angel. "Cas! Cas! Bwrd!"

"Okay Cas, the first part of the lesson is over. You are in the water!" Dean hurried in and hugged the still flailing angel. It reminded Dean of the time he tried to save a moth in a bucket of water and the dumb thing kept swimming away from him.

"Dean!" Castiel clung onto the other boy's shoulders as he tried to catch his breath.

"Cas?"

Castiel glared at him. "What?"

"You know you can stand in this water right? I would never let you drown."

Castiel carefully pushed himself away from Dean and let his shoes sink into the mud at the bottom of the lake. He frowned at Dean for a moment as Dean tried to look just as serious back at him. Castiel dunked Dean under the water. This time the blond was surprised. Castiel waded away as fast as he could with his sopping trench coat and wings.

"Oh no you don't Cas!" Dean tackled him and the two boys spent the better half of an hour laughing and ruining the lives of the fish that lived there. Sammy marched around by the bank with his floaties on waving arms and chased after ducks in the cool shallow water.

The boys later lay in the sunny grass by the bank. Dean was still recovering some sitting on an anthill and he lay with his arm flung across his eyes as Castiel eyed him worriedly. Baby Sammy napped quietly in between them and the world was quiet.

"Your face is red Dean." Castiel poked at the other boy's nose as Dean scrunched it up.

"Owww Cas! It's a sunburn. Now can't you let me die in peace?"

"What?" Castiel looked panicked as Dean rolled over on his side to look at him dramatically.

"I'm not going to survive the attack of the killer ants Cas. You and Sammy are gonna have to go on without me!"

Castiel looked startled before giving Dean a curious look. "But all that happened was that you sat on ants and they bit your butt."

Dean gave Castiel a pointed look before ripping a flower out of the grass and holding it in his hands. "I'm a goner."

"I think you will live."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Jesus Cas, you still kinda suck at this don't you? I'm not really dying."

"Yes, but I understood that."

"I was pretending again you dumb son of a bitch. Sheesh."

Castiel peeked at Dean. "Oh." He caught Dean's tragic glance once more and couldn't help but fall into a fit of giggles.

"Cas! You aren't supposed to laugh!" Dean tried to regain his dying hero character act once more but he couldn't help but laugh as Castiel laughed until he cried. "Man my butt itches." Castiel laughed harder. Dean tried every possible way to get a laugh with his new comical version. It worked every time.

"You're funny Dean." Castiel leaned over and hugged him as a still sleepy Sam yawned. Dean pressed his nose against Castiel's and grinned.

"And you are cute." Castiel's face flushed lightly as he twined his fingers with Dean.

"I wish today wouldn't end."

"Me either Cas."

Castiel nuzzled his nose against Dean's. "You're my favorite Dean."

"Well good. Cause you're my favorite."

Castiel smiled looking pleased. "You have grass in your hair."

"Yeah well your hair is longer than mine, do you know what that means?"

"No."

Dean grinned mischievously. "It means that you have more in your hair than me! And it's all over your wings too!" Castiel looked startled and sat up as he ran his hands through the soft white feathers and found prickly green blades of grass. He sat there removing bits of grass as Dean propped his hand on a hand and watched.

"You know what Cas? You look like a bird but you act like a cat."

"Shut up Dean."

Dean sat up and started to help. Castiel stiffened at first but relaxed as he felt Dean's gentle hands on the delicate feathers. "There you go bird brains." Castiel frowned as Dean zoomed around now pretending to be an airplane. Every time he was close to Dean he would feel like he had lost something when the boy pulled away. Hand in hand the boys walked back home with Sammy making sleepy yawning faces and the occasional crabby sound. Castiel smiled at Dean and got one in return as they left behind the last of the summer.

Anna watched her baby brother and noted the way he looked at Dean. The way he spent the day sighing wistfully after the boy when he wasn't within two feet of him. Castiel was in love with a human. Anna had her doubts about the leadership of the angels. She figured that she had learned this from her brave little brother. He was often brutally hurt when he returned to heaven but he would still spend his days making crowns out of long grass shoots with his Winchesters. Dean was sometimes sporting a black eye as well after one of his father's drunken visits. They were two peas in a pod and Anna could no longer tell who was sent to save who. Heaven didn't feel right but what Cas had with those boys was special. She was beginning to see that now.

She also knew how badly it would hurt Castiel if he lost Dean to the world. Someone needed to be there when Cas was left alone. Anna just hoped she could be brave enough for the two of them when it did happen. Tomorrow would come and their games would have to be packed away for a later date. Maybe that day would come and they would dust them off only to realize that they had forgotten enough to lose everything.


	6. Awakening

**So sorry everyone! I know it was been a month since I updated, so I humbly apologize! I was super busy with school but I am free now so I can regularly update again, huzzah! Thank you for the reviews and favoriting and alerting, it makes me feel fat and sassy. Enjoy!**

**Silmarlfan1- Why thank you! Not to worry, I will!**

**Miss Light Bright- Thanks! I am sorry to say that you are correct :O**

**XPercyX-Thank you, sorry it has been so long!**

**DarkPhoenix2345- Merci beaucoup! It's true! *sigh***

"Awakening"

It was Dean's first day of school. Normally it was celebrated with pancakes and photographs but Dean had not been lucky enough to be born into that kind of family. He laced up his own small pair of boots and ran a comb through his hair. He was too nervous for breakfast. Bobby had left him a box of cereal and toast that now lay in the garbage can with the empty alcohol bottles. They clinked together as Dean hid his toast. He didn't want Bobby to feel bad about not knowing the next thing about making toast. It was supposed to be dry and make you forget that it was once bread. Baby Sammy was asleep in the next room over, not knowing that his brother would be leaving him for the first time.

Dean sighed as he glanced at the door and considered hugging Sam before he left. He shifted from one foot to the other before going into the bathroom to stare at his teeth. He pulled both sides of his mouth wide to make sure he hadn't missed a spot. Dean caught Castiel's startled look in the mirror.

"Your mouth looks like a vacuum when you do that."

Dean scowled. "Way to make me feel handsome on my first day of school." He irritably fiddled with his hair as Castiel looked him over with a critical eye.

"You also have tooth paste on your shirt." Castiel smiled helpfully.

"Son of a bitch!" Dean marched out of the room as Castiel half skipped after him.

"Maybe you should wait and go tomorrow instead?" Dean moved Castiel out of the way of his closet.

"I can't Cas." Castiel looked upset as Dean pulled on a clean shirt. He glanced at the wilted angel and felt horrible. "I know it's tough Cas, but we will weather the storm." Dean put on a brave face.

"It sounds easy when you say it like that. But once you're gone I will miss you."

Dean smiled and hugged his friend. "Cas, look at me. I am not leaving you forever, got it? We're best friends Cas."

"I know Dean." Castiel sighed and lay on the bed as Dean gathered up his things and stuffed them in a back pack. He hid behind the pillows and placed his shoes on the wall like he had seen Dean do countless times.

"Okay Cas. Looks like it is time for me to go." Dean looked wistfully back at his angel as Castiel peeked at him from behind the pillow mountain on the bed. Castiel hurried out and ran to Dean. "Why is it so hard to leave you?"

"You aren't leaving, remember? You are going to school and then you will be back. Then we can play together."

Dean grinned. "That's right Cas." He tiptoed past Bobby's closed door and walked outside as Sammy began to wail.

"I'll help him Dean. You go ahead."

Dean looked disappointed. He had been eager to have Castiel on his walk to the school. "Thanks Cas, you're the best."

Castiel gave him a small smile before heading back into the house. He held up the still sleepy baby and hugged him to his chest while Dean stood in front of the house for a few minutes more.

The first week passed and Castiel tried to pretend that things had stayed the same. That Dean didn't have things on his mind besides flying kites in the late summer air. Dean came home with real stories. Of what so and so did at school today and how Dean wished he could run as fast as his new buddy Andy at school. He remembered Castiel from time to time and would make him something from school. Castiel stashed away Dean's rather…inspiring of two stick figures and their adventures. Cas knew it was him when he saw the doodled wings. He smiled. Dean was just like him, he thought. He couldn't stop thinking about him all day and it was nice to see that Dean didn't forget him either.

The small angel spent his hours playing with baby Sammy whenever Bobby was away. The negligent baby sitter painted her nails scarlet, red nails gripped a phone. Sammy could have crawled away for hours without being missed. Cas read to him from Dean's book of stories and tried to not giggle too loudly when the baby learned how to roar like a dragon. Dean sat in a blue plastic seat and learned about more important things. His imagination was sent to work on creative ways to answer a math problem when he didn't know the answer. Whenever Bobby was in charge of the baby for the day Castiel spent his time looking through Dean's school books. If there was something Dean didn't understand Cas had probably already read that chapter and was ready to guide Dean to the right answer.

"Hey Cas!" Dean threw his bag onto the counter as he shuffled into the house. He kicked off his shoes and smiled when he found Castiel with his nose in a book, Sammy demolishing a building of bricks next to him. "Hey Samster."

"Dean!" Castiel hurried over and embraced his friend with a smile.

"Hey buddy, what're you learning about today?"

Castiel passed Sammy his juice cup. "History. The scribes have gotten a lot of things wrong. It is actually quite funny."

Dean grinned and shook his head. "You are such a dork, Cas." He ruffled his hair before plopping onto the rug next to him. He stretched dramatically and yawned. "I'm pooped."

Castiel looked disgusted at Dean. "I am hoping that was just a phrase and you didn't-"

"Jeeze Cas. I love coming home from a long day to be reminded of how little you think of me."

Castiel eyed him for a moment before smiling. Dean was joking. "I missed you today."

Dean grinned. "I know, you say that every day."

Castiel nodded solemnly." That is because I miss you every day."

"You have been watching too many soap operas when I go to school." Dean glanced over at him with his cheeks flushed pink, looking pleased.

Castiel smiled when he saw Dean smiling back at him. He glanced down at his untied shoes looking pleased. Once more the large book was opened as Dean read aloud to the small angel holding his baby brother. Cas shifted Sam on his lap and laughed. Sam roared at the appropriate moments for the dragon while Dean charmed them with his dashing prince impersonation. Cas batted his eyelashes shyly as he felt Dean's hand close over his, warm and safe.

"And the prince kissed the beautiful princess awake…" Dean leaned over and kissed Castiel sweetly on the cheek. "-and they lived happily ever after!"

"Dean." Castiel smiled softly as he felt Dean kiss his cheek. "I am not a princess."

Dean grinned. "So what? I may be charming and dangerously handsome, but I'm not a prince. When we are here together we can be whatever we want to be. And Cas?" Castiel peeked up at him through dark lashes. "I think you're beautiful. So there."

Castiel felt his face flush as he held hands with Dean. "I would complement you as well, but it seems you had already done so."

"Ahh ha! So you think I am charming?"

"Yes." Castiel smiled as Dean ruffled his hair in his usual way. "I wish this could come true."

"What could come true Cas?"

Castiel looked down at their hands. "Us. I want us to be a dream forever."

"Cas? Cas…look at me." Castiel glanced up as he felt tears run down his face. "Why are you sad Cas? Are you hurt?"

"No..." Castiel shook his head. "Just being here…makes me happy." A small hand grasped lightly on his wing and Castiel smiled softly at the baby as he wiped the tears off of his face. "There is no place better Dean, than with you."

"Awww damn it Cas. It wouldn't be this awesome without you too." Castiel smiled as Dean hugged him and Sammy. In that moment it didn't matter that John wasn't home or that in a few hours Castiel would need to return to heaven while Dean packed his worn backpack for the next day.

.

Fall whispered in the air and swallowed up the last of the warm summer rays. Dean outgrew his shoes in the months that had passsed while Sammy brandished his full set of baby teeth. Nights became longer and cooler. Castiel spent every moment possible with Dean but it was never enough. Rain splattered against the rooftops of a gray city as Castiel wandered up to the old splintery porch. Dean had taught him not to zap into a house. Unless it was necessary it was unnecessarily rude, Dean had said. Something like that.

But he hadn't said much of anything lately whether a reprimand or horrible joke that Castiel often didn't understand. Dean had been quiet lately. Normally Cas enjoyed listening to the boy's prayers which were often amusing. Sometimes they left him wistful when Dean sounded scared in the lonely night or when John had spilled too much alcohol in one evening.

He had been forgetting. Some nights he was kept up finding ways to earn some food for his brother when John left them for too long. Castiel helped when he could but when Dean found out that Castiel had been stealing food for him, he hadn't been very happy. Castiel had a hard time understanding the worth of personal belongings. Couldn't everyone just share so no one was left hungry and cold in the quiet night?

Castiel placed his hand on the door handle and was about to push the door open when he saw Dean sitting in the computer chair with another boy laughing next to him. Cas felt something heavy in his chest. Jealously. He felt it burn through his veins as Dean put on one of his usual performances that always was applauded by Castiel's laughter. Sammy tugged on the other boy's shirt and climbed on his lap as Castiel felt dizzy. He was about to leave when he heard Sam shout "Casss! Casss! Bwrd!"

Dean opened the door and looked surprised at the dripping wet angel on his door step. "Hey Cas buddy, how have you been?" Cas nodded as he took noticed of the shiner Dean was sporting.

"Are you in pain? Castiel reached over and gently placed a hand on Dean's cheek as the stranger gawked at him.

"Nah Cas."

Castiel glanced up at him sadly. "Was it your-"

"Okay, who wants to watch TV?" Dean awkwardly made his way over to the television and turned it on after giving Castiel a warning look.

"Who's the feathered freak?" Castiel looked surprised.

Dean looked mad. "Don't call him that Alex. His name is Cas."

Castiel tilted his head to the side as he studied the boy. He glanced at Dean for reassurance as he reached out his hand towards Alex. "Hello. My name is Castiel. I am an angel of the Lord."

The other boy looked at Dean for a moment before bursting out in laughter. "What kinda stuff is he smoking? These can't be real." He reached over and ripped out a handful of feathers as Castiel cried out in shock and pain. Blood dripped from the assaulted wing as Castiel stepped away from him in fear. He glanced at Dean, blue eyes wide and questioning.

"Cas, it's okay." Dean reached out for the angel who quietly took his hand. He felt safe once more as Dean wrapped his arms around Castiel's body as he shivered with pain.

"Wow Dean. Didn't know you were such a fag. The others said you were cool." Alex tucked his hands in his pockets as he attempted to not look sorry about hurting the angel.

"Get out."

"What?"

Dean wrapped one arm around Castiel and pointed to the door with the other. "I said get out!" He gripped onto Castiel's hand as he took a step forward.

"Alright I'm going." He scowled at Dean and Castiel. "Have fun with your princess." He slammed the door as Dean offered Castiel a wry grin.

"Looks like you are a princess after all." Castiel smiled and buried his face in Dean's neck feeling relieved.

"You saved me Dean."

Dean nodded. "I suppose I did. I am awesome Cas!" Castiel nodded as he glanced at the feathers on the floor. Blood still dripped down the feathers of one wing he didn't want to be out of Dean's arms just yet. "Let's get you fixed up buddy." Castiel sighed and nodded, not noticing when Dean lifted up a feather from the ground and tucked it into his pocket.

Cas sat on the edge of the bathtub looking nervously back at Dean. "Come on Cas, I can't do anything if you won't let me touch you."

Castiel nodded and turned away from Dean. He felt the boy's tender hands smooth over some of the ruffled feathers and he relaxed. Dean turned on the shower head and rinsed off the now pink feathers as gently as possible. Castiel watched him but remained relaxed as he only winced occasionally at the pain. Dean looked surprised when the wounds began to heal over.

"Nice work Cas."

Castiel smiled and looked surprised when he felt Dean plant a light kiss where he had been injured. "Dean?"

"It's all okay now. I kissed it better." Dean gently placed a Band-Aid over a still bleeding cut. "There we go."

Castiel leaned over and hugged Dean. "Thank you Dean, I am sorry about your friend."

"It's okay Cas. Any dick who thinks he can hurt my angel is no friend of mine." Dean stood up and held out a hand to him. Castiel spent the night curled up with Dean and Sammy as the moon cast soft shadows on the walls. Things hadn't been right for a while, but now Castiel felt like things were back to normal. Dean had stood up for him and he always would. He loved that boy more than anything and it felt good to know that he loved him too.


	7. Time Flies

**Okay. This is a little later than planned, but here you lovelies go! I started working on another story but will try to not post it for a while so I can finish the three unfinished ones I have up. Eeek. Thank you sooooo much reviewers, you guys are amazing!**

**-Paperganstah**

**Darkphoenix2345- Haha no worries. He was a temporary character and will be out of sight and mind FOREVER! Glad you noticed that :) and I love me some Destiel fluff!**

**Silmarfan1- Thank you! :D**

**Stephanswifey01- Thank you for commenting on all the previous chapters, you are awesome! Haha I liked the idea of the Winchesters already having tiny battles. Oh and you are welcome lol.**

**Xpercyx- Thank you very much! I am delighted that you love it!**

**XMikiferx- XD Cas really is a cutie! It's lucky for him that he has a Dean to protect him!**

Time Flies

Years went by before the boys realized that they had lost them. Little Sammy could no longer be called little as every night he seemed to grow another inch. Dean kept his freckles but grew into his handsome features. He didn't notice this at first but soon the girls began to notice for him. His deep green and gold eyes, His soft dark blond hair and wicked smile. The girls were smitten as was Dean.

It didn't take Dean long to catch onto their games as girls let him catch them on the school field. Jo had even given up her desert to him the day before and it had been pie. _Apple pie_. Dean fell in love with her for the day only to forget her shining blond hair and skills at chicken fighting when he gazed into blue eyes once more.

Cas remained as innocent as ever and never seemed to run out of questions. Dean liked that. Cas was there no matter what .One time Dean got an embarrassing and uncomfortable case of head lice and Castiel stayed by his side even as Dean complained like he was dying. Cas hadn't changes be he began to realize that Dean had. He had become a lady killer but came home to Cas with his same old back pack in tow. Dean would dump out all of its contents and Cas would forge parental signatures and do homework with him. Sometimes Dean would be busy on the phone with friends he had left behind in another state. Friends came and went as John moved his boys across the states. Dean's almost foolishly loyal angel went with him and tried to grip onto everything as it slipped away.

"I kissed Lisa Braeden!" Castiel looked up surprised as Dean came flouncing into the room with a Cheshire cat-like grin. Dean unleashed his bag and it went flying onto an unmade bed.

"Who is Lisa Braeden?" Castiel carefully folded a small red jacket of Sam's and placed it into a suitcase.

Dean looked impressed with himself. "I dunno Cas, only the most popular girl in school? Oh and I lied earlier, she kissed _me_."

Castiel's mouth tightened as he rather roughly stuffed a teddy bear under a pile of shirts. "Why did she do that?"

Dean grinned. "She said I was cuuuuuuuute. Just like on Rudolph."

"I don't understand that reference." Castiel marched past Dean to hand Sammy a gram cracker.

"Oh-ho is someone crabby?" Dean hugged his angel only for him to attempt to escape. "Are you jealous Cas?" Dean made a smoochy face at Cas only to get decked in the face. Castiel marched out of the room as Dean looked like a baffled fish.

Sam giggled and Dean sent a fierce glare his way. His little brother stopped laughing and adopted a rather wise look. "You made Cas sad."

"Damn it Sammy, I know. The thing is…I don't even know what the hell I did!"

Sam chewed on the gram cracker thoughtfully. "I would suggest you stop kissing Lisa." Dean looked surprised. "Look, he was happy until you mentioned that."

"But why would that make him upset?"

Sam shrugged. "I don't know Dean. Try asking him."

"Huh. You just keep getting smarter don't you?" Sam smiled. "You're still a bitch though." Dean marched out the door as Sam smiled and carried on with his homework.

"Jerk."

Dean marched out of his room and wandered around the house but Castiel was nowhere to be found. "Cas? Cas? Hey Cas where are you?" He wandered outside and found the angel sitting on a tire in the front yard. "Cas?"

Castiel turned around and smiled softly. "Dean. I would like to apologize for my earlier actions…I am unsure of what came over me."

Dean laughed. "It's okay Cas." He sat on the edge of the tire and looked scrutinizing at the angel. Castiel shifted uncomfortably. "Why do you think it upset you?"

Castiel shook his head and rested his chin on his hands. "I do not know Dean."

"Yeah." It was silent for a while as Dean watched a crow peck at the scarecrow Bobby had made. "You know, Sammy's birthday is gonna be around the corner soon."

"Yes I know. He will be…seven in a week and three days."

Dean whistled, looking impressed. "Damn Cas. You remember that?"

Castiel nodded. "Of course."

Dean chewed on a piece of grass as he glanced over at Castiel. "Can you zap over here for his birthday? After the party part? We can have our own, with just the three of us."

Castiel nodded looking pleased. "Yes, I believe that I would like that."

"Good. You know what Cas?"

Castiel looked curious. "Yes Dean?"

"I miss the heck out of you, you son of a bitch. I feel like I never see you anymore."

"That is because you don't. No don't apologize- I understand." He fussed with his untied shoe as Dean placed an arm around his shoulders.

"Shit. I wish things weren't like this Cas." He gripped the angel's hand tightly and looked into his deep blue eyes. "You know how you always talk about missing me?" Castiel nodded looking embarrassed. "Well Cas, if you miss me even half as much as I miss you then I am sorry. I know it hurts." Castiel leaned over and hugged Dean.

"You make me super happy Dean."

"Okay Kai-lan."

Castiel laughed, actually catching on to the reference for once. Sammy had been a Ni-hao Ki-lan watcher when he had been small. "No Dean…I…" Castiel looked frustrated and balled his hands into fists.

"It's alright Cas. Use your words huggy bear."

Castiel eyed the dirt quietly. "I do not know how to say what I am feeling…" He glanced up at Dean and saw his face was so close that he could count each and every one of his freckles.

"Hmmm…are you happy?"

Castiel looked thoughtful and nodded. "Yes, but with you I feel a different kind of happy."

Dean scooted closer. "And what do you want to do when you feel like this?" Castiel looked panicked as Dean leaned in with his long eyelashes fluttering closed.

"Dean? Where are you at sonny?"

"Son of a bitch." Dean muttered and pulled away. He looked amused as Castiel still sat there with is eyes closed and his eyebrows knotted in confusion. "Cas, it's Bobby-" Castiel zapped away in an instant as Bobby wandered over.

"What're you still doing out here kiddo? It's time for dinner." Bobby fixed Dean with a stern eye as the boy dusted off his pants and began to walk towards the house. "You may have forgotten, but I know that even at your age kids should be doing homework right now. Get yours done."

"Yes sir." Dean pouted.

"And who were you talking to?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "No one Bobby. Is the interrogation over?"

"It is." Bobby looked amused as Dean tramped up to the house with his shoulders stiff and embarrassed. "You still got that imaginary friend of yours? What was his name?"

"Shut it Bobby!"

Dean slammed the door as Bobby made his way after him and shook his head fondly. "Idgit."

Sam had a wonderful birthday that year. Sure John couldn't be bothered to swing down but he had a case. Something to do with a nasty witch. Sam realized that he didn't really care all that much. He wasn't as offended as Dean was as his older brother marched up and down the stairs muttering under his breath darkly. Of course Dean would never directly insult their father. But while he was gone he could holler "son of a bitch" at the top of his lungs. Presents piled up and it was evident that Sammy was well loved by the children in his classroom, even though he had only known them for a short while.

"Not a bad turn out Sammy boy!" Dean plopped on the couch with Sam as they waited for Cas to zap into the room.

"Not at all." Sam smiled. "Dean, I wish we didn't have to leave again."

Dean sighed. "I know man. But just think about it. Maybe dad will gank that demon this year and be done with it all."

Sam nodded as he flipped through the cartoons. "TV always sucks when it is this late."

Dean leaned over and watched the channels flip by. "I'm sure there is something on, you are just scrolling too fast. Damn it stop changing the channels so fast!"

"Dude, _Gumby_ and crappy talk shows? No way Dean."

"Shut your mouth bitch and let me see the remote control."

"No jerk. It's my birthday."

Dean groaned. "Alright Sammy. Do your worst."

Sam giggled and changed the channel. Gumby.

"Damn it Sam!" Dean wrestled with his brother until Cas zapped into the room and observed them quietly.

"Happy birthday Sam."

Dean and Sam looked surprised and stopped. "Thanks Cas!" Sam ran over and hugged Castiel happily. Castiel handed over a large poorly wrapped package and looked shyly down at the floor. Sam tried to lift it and couldn't since it was way large than him.

"Jeeze Cas, I always forget how strong you are." Dean wrapped an arm around his shoulders and grinned as Sam tore into the wrapper.

"Cas? You got me the bike I wanted?" Sam ripped off the last of the paper off.

Dean grinned. "How did you get it Cas?"

"I worked a paper route for a while. I know not to steal now and I wanted Sam to have his bike." Castiel stood awkwardly as Sam shouted in delight and climbed onto the bike seat.

"You are just way too good to us Winchesters." Castiel's face flushed. "Too bad didn't get to see you trying to act like a normal kid. How was the paper route?"

"Long. Methodical. All I had to do was place a newspaper on the walkway of each home in a timely manner. It was not a "big deal" as you would say." He looked pleased when Sam whooshed past him on the bike.

"Come on Cas, it's pretty nice outside right now. Want any cake?" Castiel shook his head and followed Sam outside the door as the boy shot outside on his new bike.

Dean came out moments later with a grand attempt to balance piles of bright colored objects in his arms. "Hey Cas, do you like fireworks?"

"Fireworks?" Castiel tilted his head to the side curiously.

"Cas, you can't have lived and not seen these things. Sheesh."

Sam parked his bike in the soft green grass before hurrying over to the other boys. "Are you sure Dean?"

Dean grinned. "Of course I am. Dad's not here to say no, right?"

Sam grinned back and hugged his brother. "Thanks Dean, Dad would have never let us do this."

Dean lit up the first cracker and set it off into the dark sky. Sparks rained down left small balls of smoke in the grass. Castiel jumped at the sound but looked in awe at the sprinkling of blue and green sparks in the sky. Fireflies snuck by in short bursts of light and the boys chased them breathlessly for a while. Sam got bored first when the one he chased lighted out and disappeared.

"Can I try one Dean?" Sam dug through the pile of crackers.

"Go ahead Sammy."

Sam looked disgruntled. "It's Sam, I'm too old for all the Sammy crap." He lit one up an looked delighted when red scared a bird right out of a tree. "Did you see that one Dean?"

"Sure did Sam-" He remembered to leave off the last. At least for the rest of Sam's birthday anyway.

"Try it out Cas. Go on." Cas lit a cracker with trepidation and winced when it roared into the sky. He blinked in surprise at the pinkish sparks that exploded overhead. "Haha you got a pink one?"

Castiel pushed Dean with a smile as he felt Dean grasp his hands for a few moments. They stood there awkwardly staring at each other for a few moments until Cas leaned in and kissed Dean on the nose.

"Gross you guys!" Sam ran by and the field sparked from another cracker. Cas put out the fire with his shoe as Sam continued to skip-run to the edges of the trees. Dean glanced back at Castiel when he heard a scream from the forest.

"Sammy? Sammy? What the hell happened?"

Dean ran down the hill towards the trees as Castiel zapped ahead of him with his heart beating loudly in his chest.


	8. Avenging Angel

**Yes, last chapter I left you with a cruel and unusual cliffhanger. You were all properly horrified and I was pleased that you do care so much for these guys! Thank you so much for the reviews, they were awesome as always :D**

**Stephanswifey01- Haha I love when the Winchesters troll each other.**

**xPercyx- Why thank you :) I love 'em too!**

**xMikiferx- Yeah, feelings are still not his best subject! Thanks, I know. Oh Bobby, you moment-bomber!**

**Roxxroj- I know *looks shifty and guilty* Hellz yeah you are getting some Destiel!**

**Silmarlfan1- Yep! I will!**

**Ly- Thanks :) You are welcome.**

**LewdSir- Haters gonna hate. Thank you! I have a lot of fun writing Dean this way, and I am glad you have caught up on this story, welcome!**

**Darkphoenix2345- Haha oh noes! You're right! He's going to be in your nightmares from now on…dun dun! I liked the idea of tiny Cas trying to do something normal kids have a breeze doing. Poor thing would probably have a difficult time!**

**Miss Light Bright- Oh no! Sorry for scaring you!**

"Avenging Angel"

Cas hurried down the steep hill and heard Dean puffing behind him. He tried to visualize a clearing in the trees so he could fly there but all was dark. A log caught onto the angel's permanently untied shoelace and he went tumbling down the rest of the hill. Dean tried to slow down but Cas shook his head.

"I will be there Dean, hurry!" Dean nodded and ran into the forest. Castiel ripped the shoelace out and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and zapped right next to a tree. That had been a close one. He took as large strides as he could with his small legs, overcoat billowing out behind him. "Sam?"

Nothing. Castiel looked worried and felt rather ill. He was about to call out again when felt something grab onto his trench coat. Castiel turned; ready to attack when he saw Sam's pale, scared face. The boy's hand gripped tighter and Castiel nodded at him in assurance. He held out his hand to Sam and walked him quietly around the large oak. He heard voices in the clearing ahead. Castiel glanced at Sam and nodded quietly. Sam followed slowly after the angel, keeping his eyes on the ground so he wouldn't trip over anything.

"Damn it, looks like we got the wrong Winchester. Where did the other one go?" A demon snarled, eyes so dark they looked like they had been removed.

"You let him go. Impressive work. Really admirable." Yellow eyes gave off a pale light and Castiel figured he liked them less than the darker eyes. These were mischievous and cunning. "We need him, but we don't really need this one...hmmm… not a bit of demon blood in him."

Sam swallowed when he heard the smile in the other demon's voice. "I'm sure we could think of some way to use this one…"

"And I am certain that you won't." Castiel stepped forward with his hand extended in front of him as he slowly made his way towards the demons. "Release Dean Winchester."

"How adorable! What do we have here?" Yellow eyes fixed themselves onto the small angel as he tried to look imposing in his untied dress shoes. "Hmmm smells clean. What are you sweetheart?"

Castiel swallowed slowly. "I am an angel of the Lord. Release him now or your death will not be a merciful one."

A female demon looked nervously over at Azazel. "Boss, maybe we should just let this one go."

"No Meg. He doesn't look so threatening. Did you grumpy little babies skip a nap today?"

Castiel looked insulted. "I am not a baby." He puffed out his chest importantly like he had seen Dean do many times. He glanced over at the older Winchester and was heartened by his proud smile. "It is now time for you to die."

Castiel flicked his wrist and one demon went flying and crashed into a tree. His eyes remained dark but he struggled to stand up. Castiel moved forward, chanting slowly. Black smoke billowed out of the demon's mouth as he tilted back his head with a painful scream. Sam stood close to dark ring of trees looking scared. The angel turned towards another demon. Azazel watched as more smoke was ripped out of a mouth that was distorted with the force of the monster escaping. Cas knocked over another demon and placed his small hand on her forehead. Lights flashed behind her eyes.

"Cas look out!" Castiel turned around only to find a demon behind him, knife in hand. He extended his hand but another demon snatched the sensitive white feathers that streamed from the angel's back. Castiel felt the tears stinging at the corners of his eyes. It felt dirty. The retched hand tugged and Castiel felt feathers slip away. He fought back as another hand gripped into his other wing. The yellow eyed demon stepped forward and pulled Castiel's face up. He searched the innocent blue eyes.

"Such a pretty little thing you are. It is almost a shame that we will have to kill you now." He raised a fist and it collided with Castiel's jaw. Again and again the fist made contact and broke skin. Castiel spit out a mouthful of blood into the dirt when Dean through a rock at the demon.

"Come on! Stop hurting him you chicken ass son of a bitch!" Castiel looked surprised at Dean before muttering quickly and the demon let go of him. Sam hurried into the clearing, repeating what he heard from Castiel earlier. He looked impressed when the yellow eyed demon's face contorted in a snarl and the black smoke escaped the body he had been contained in.

Sam hurried over to Castiel as Dean exorcised the last demon. "Cas! Did you see that? Look man, I-I did it!" Castiel nodded slowly looking dizzy. He looked rather proud at the gawky boy as he was pulled to his feet.

"You are a fast learner, Sam Winchester." Sam looked embarrassedly down at his feet.

"Thanks Cas." Castiel offered the boy a slight smile as he wavered on his feet.

Castiel placed a hand on his shoulder and looked him over. "Did they harm you?"

Sam nodded, holding out his bruised wrist. The angel rested light fingers over the hurt and Sam looked surprised when it began to heal. Dean hurried over and watched in awe.

"Shit Cas, you really are something, you know that?" This time Castiel looked embarrassed.

"I am sure we would not be celebrating if the both of you hadn't helped me out."

Dean leaned over and grasped both sides of the angel's face. He leaned in and shyly planted a kiss onto the other boy's full mouth. Castiel's eyes widened and he stood stiffly for a moment, unsure of what he was supposed to do. He felt heat run through his body. Dean Winchester was actually kissing him! Castiel wrapped his arms around the taller boy's neck and shyly kissed him back.

Dean pulled his mouth away a bit breathlessly. "You saved me and my brother Cas. I couldn't ever thank you enough. Now that Sammy's neck is getting longer he likes to stick it where it doesn't belong."

"Dude, I'm sure there are plenty of things you want to stick where they don't belong, especially with Cas!"

Dean's face went bright red. Castiel simply tilted his head; perpetually confused as always. "Stick what things where?" He smiled encouragingly at Dean.

"Sam's just being a douche. Come on guys, let's go home. We don't want any of those butthole eyed demons to find us again."

.

"He did it. You saw them stop all of those demons Raphael!"

Raphael glowered down at Anna. "He still couldn't handle all of the demons himself. The Winchester boys both nearly died tonight."

"Not many angels could have handled so many demons, including Azazel, at Castiel's age. He's special."

Raphael smiled slowly. "And with that statement, I agree. Soon we will have to move him into a garrison. He was always an odd one and now that he spends his days bug hunting with humans?" Raphael shook his head in disgust. "He will soon find himself in deep trouble that his Winchesters cannot help him with."

"That is why we chose Cas for this job, and he is good at it Raphael! He's sensitive, he feels things that we may never understand. To him this is more than a duty, and if love is involved then shouldn't that be even better? Castiel will never let harm come to those two boys."

"Love? An angel in love? Tell me Anna, when was the last time a human and angel fell in love?"

Anna thought for a moment and then slowly shook her head. "I don't know."

"Precisely. This sort of thing does not happen. It is not allowed and for a good reason. We are angels Anna, be proud of what you are! We are God's children-"

"How? How am I supposed to be proud of this? I have been alive for a long time…and I haven't had enough feelings to care! Am I sad? Am I lonely sometimes? No. I do the work for a father that I will never meet without question. No more Raphael!" Anna pulled out her angel blade.

"Anna?" Raphael's voice took on a silky tone. "What are you doing with that blade Anna? Be a good girl and put it down."

Anna shook her head. "I am done with this, and I am certainly done with you!" The blade shifted in her hand and a flash of light erupted from where Anna once stood. Blood shone in a silvery pool and Raphael felt ill. Anna had ripped out her Grace. His sister had chosen to fall. He watched the last spark of light vanish into the night air.

.

"You were a total badass out there Cas!" Castiel smiled at his boys as they still showered him with praise. They sat clean and in an assortment of superhero pajamas on Dean's bed. "Okay Cas, your turn."

Castiel rolled the dice and moved his piece. He looked dismayed. "Do I really have to go to jail?"

Dean nodded, looking important. "It's the law Cas. I wouldn't be worried if I were you, you already bought Boardwalk so I am sure you are going to win anyway."

Castiel sighed and moved the piece onto the jail square. Dean's hand brushed against his and he jumped lightly. Close contact with Dean had never been a problem for him before and he seemed to delight in basking in Dean's personal space. But now? He was confused. Dean sat near him on the bed and Castiel's heart pounded loudly in his chest. He placed an arm around his angel's thin shoulders and Castiel shivered at the touch. Dean had kissed him. No one had ever kissed him before, and Dean had been the only one to kiss him on the cheek before. But that was different….it had been nice and Cas had wanted more. Now that he had gotten more the yearning was worse. What did he want from Dean Winchester that he didn't want from anyone else?"

"Cas! Earth to Castiel!" Dean hollered in Castiel's face and the angel jumped lightly.

"Yes Dean?" Castiel swallowed Dean was very close to him once more.

Sam grinned. "It's your turn dude."

"Oh." Castiel rolled the dice once more and leaned back into Dean. He felt the other boy's warmth and sat up quickly.

"Cas? What has gotten into you, you crazy son of a bitch? Huh?"

Castiel moved his pieced onto a railroad spot and paid Sam in the flimsy Monopoly money. "Nothing Dean." He distractedly rubbed the back of his neck.

"Come one Cas. Nothing?" Castiel shook his head and Dean grinned. "You've been super jumpy since the forest. Are you just freaked about the demons?"

Castiel thought for a moment and shook his head. "No, although I am very worried about your safety now. Perhaps I should go talk to my superiors…"

"Not yet mister fancy pants." He began to lead Castiel out of the room. "Sammy, I need to talk to Cas, no cheating in there!"

"I never cheat!" Sam sounded rather insulted.

Castiel nodded solemnly. "He is correct."

"What, he doesn't cheat?" Dean placed a hand in the small of Castiel's back and steered him into the adjoining room.

"He doesn't but you do."

Dean grinned. "Yep, and he almost never catches me! I can't ever sneak by you though, huh?"

Castiel shook his head slowly. "Never. I always know."

"And I always know when something is up with you." Dean sat in a folding chair in the kitchenette and pulled a rather surprised Castiel onto his lap. He rested his chin on top of the angel's unruly brown hair and sighed peacefully. "You know Cas, you're pretty special."

Castiel looked surprised and glanced back at Dean in wonder. "Special?"

"Yeah. A lot of bad things happen to us Cas. I'm not complaining right now, it's just true. Mom died…Dad's usually gone. A kid tried to beat me up yesterday because my only clean shirt had a bear on it."

"The 'I Wuv Hugs' shirt? But I like that one." Castiel frowned.

Dean laughed. "You are so cute Cas! And that is part of the problem."

"Problem?' Dean felt Castiel's shoulder's stiffen against his chest.

"Yeah." Dean ruffled Castiel's hair fondly. "I can't stop thinking about you Cas." The boy whispered against Castiel's neck and he felt his heart racing once more.

"Dean…" Castiel shifted around on the other boy's lap until they were face to face. He pressed his nose against Dean's lightly. "I can't stop thinking about you either."

"Good." Dean's face went a bit pink as he leaned in and kissed Castiel once more. "Is that okay?"

Castiel nodded. "Yes Dean." Dean held his angel for a long time. He didn't know or care how much time had passed as he ruffled through white feathers. Castiel rested his head against Dean's shoulder with a slight smile. Sammy fell asleep on the Monopoly board and a hotel stuck to his cheek as the clock ticked passed midnight. That night the Winchesters and their angel slept peacefully as their enemies allowed them this night to spend together before darkness rallied at their hearts and minds. Night tucked them into their own little world. They were safe there; for the time being.


	9. Forgotten

**I am sooooo sorry this is very late! Don't hate me.**

**Thank you Castiel52, xpercyx, The Stygian Angel, Party-Like-A-Hawkster, darkphoenix2345, snowin' you, and FireChildSlytherin5 for reviews. That was very sexy of y'all :) Sorry about le wait. I have been disgustingly busy. I plan on finishing this story soon so no more lengthy waits!**

**-Paperganstah**

**Forgotten**

Dean was sporting a black eye from his father's latest visit but the anger had dulled in him. He missed his old man. Sam had been bitchier lately but now that he was a pre-teen Dean figured he would cut him some slack. At the very mention of the currently missing John Winchester he looked pinched. He really was growing up. Dean watched his brother's reactions change over the years. No longer did little Sammy cry when John didn't show up for a birthday or mope by the phone in the hopes of a call from Daddy Dearest.

Castiel spent the past couple of years quietly caring for the Winchesters. Now that Anna was gone from heaven none of the other angels cared to hear about them as long as they were healthy. He was often lonely. Dean didn't call on him for help as often as he used too. Most of the calls had been centered around Dean being lonely himself and he prayed for the angel's devoted attention. The angel watched Dean as he made friends and lost them. He was there whenever John wasn't, which was most of the time. If Dean didn't call on his angel Castiel would find him instead.

A storm raged at the windows but the boys were tucked safely away in the dingy hotel room. The power was out. It had been out for a few hours now. Candles melted in the holders and the room was cold. A chocolate ice cream cake lay melting on the counter in the kitchen. Dean would be sixteen when the twelve o' clock hour struck and here he was celebrating it with the two people he loved most.

Castiel was sandwiched in between the two Winchester brothers on one of the beds as they played Nintendo. He nestled against Dean's chest. Dean slowly ran a hand through Castiel's messy hair while Sam tried to beat a boss level. He caught Castiel's hand in his as the angel tucked him under a soft white wing.

"I give up." Sam threw the controller down on the comforter. "I can't do it man."

Dean grinned. "You don't have to act like such a bitch about it. Jesus Sammy it's a game."

"Yeah. You try it. I'm going to bed."

"Whatever Samsquatch." Sam pulled a bitch face as he wandered sleepily into the next room.

Cas stretched and let Dean pull him closer. He felt his pulse quicken as the younger Winchester closed the door between them. Now it was just the angel and Dean wrapped in the quiet dark.

"Dad's moving us again Cas." Dean played absently with ruffled white feathers. "Looks like we're going back to Kansas. I think he's sniffed up some clues as to where that thing that killed mom is."

"Has he talked to you about it?"

Dean shook his head slowly and rested his head against the angel's chest. "Nope. Figures huh?"

"He must be trying to protect you."

Dean huffed. "Yeah right Cas. If I was his top priority he would be here right now. I miss the hell out of him and all he can think about it is revenge. I want that thing dead. I want that sonofabitch to suffer. I just… I don't know…" Dean sighed heavily.

"I understand. You have not only lost your mother to this…son of a bitch… but your father as well."

Dean chuckled at Castiel's mechanical attempt at cussing. "Yeah. Right as always Cas. Can't he just wait until I can come with him?"

Castiel kissed him lightly on the forehead. "No. You are too precious a thing to lose."

Dean grinned and pounced on top of the angel. "Am I Cas? How precious am I to you? Huh?"

The boy was too close. Castiel locked his eyes with green and couldn't pull away. Blood rushed to his face and his wings twitched nervously. "Very," Castiel responded lamely.

"Hmmhhmm. Well I was very important to the girls at the school in this city. I almost got laid until Dad rang last night."

Castiel looked confused. "Got laid? I do not understand that phrase."

Dean grinned. "Of course not Cas. You are just an innocent little virgin, aren't you?"

Castiel flushed and tried to escape Dean's eyes. "Yes Dean."

"Me too buddy." Dean got even closer so his body was aligned with Castiel's. "Have you ever thought about it?" Dean's voice whispered over the angel's skin and Castiel couldn't hold back a shudder.

"Dean…I…"

"Yeah Cas? Am I making you nervous?" Dean mouthed the words against Castiel's neck and smiled at his erratic pulse.

"Yes…Dean. I am finding myself to be very uncomfortable right now." Castiel lay frozen as Dean rolled on top of him.

Dean kissed him along the temple gently. "I've been thinking about you a lot lately Cas."

"You…have?" Castiel barely choked out the words as Dean's mouth hovered an inch away from his own.

"Hell yeah. You're beautiful, you know that?" Castiel hummed, unsure of what to say. "I just want-"He traced his fingertips over the angel's mouth. "I just… I'm gonna kiss you right now."

"Dean…I-"

Dean pressed his nose against Castiel's. He looked into the angel's deep blue eyes and took a dive into their depths. It was like velvet. Soft and sweet. Cas froze only for a moment. Then he melted. Dean was so warm and gentle. A hand ran through his hair and another clutched at his wings. _This_, this was what he wanted from Dean.

"Is this okay?" Dean pulled away, breathless.

"Yes." Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean's neck. "I want many things from you, but I am unsure of what they are. I cannot name these…feelings."

"You talk like a robot Cas. You're lucky you make it cute or I wouldn't want to kiss you so much!" Dean planted a sloppy kiss on his mouth. Cas kissed him back, just a unsure of himself but just as eager.

"What are we doing Dean?"

Dean shook his head and offered Cas a wry grin. "I guess whatever feels good."

Castiel held his breath as Dean placed his hands on his body. Dean's hands shuddered and Castiel realized that Dean was just as scared as he was. "I trust you."

"What?" Dean swallowed.

"I trust you Dean. Do not be afraid."

Castiel felt Dean's smile against his cheek. He tentatively placed a kiss on Dean's nose and the gesture was all he could brave. It was a familiar touch.

"That's not gonna be enough this time Cas." Dean wrapped the surprised angel in his arms. "I want more."

"Me too." Castiel relaxed more as Dean caught his hand and held it for a moment. He gently kissed the palm before he worked at the buttons on the angel's shirt. The angel watched Dean with wide eyes as he tugged on the worn cloth of Dean's shirt. He leaned in for a kiss and received one with a message of lust behind it. Everything was slow but the beating of their hearts. Dean gripped at the angel's hips when he suddenly felt the air get knocked out of him.

"Cas?" Dean wheezed. Did Cas actually hit him? He sat up slowly as his alarm went off in a frenzy.

Cas reached out towards Dean when something yanked him off the bed and he hit his head against the head board. Blood streamed into his eye as he began to panic. He rolled off of the mattress. Dean was somewhere near him and he could hear something pounding its fists into the boy's flesh.

"Get the knife and be done with it." Meg's voice reverberated through the room, slow and smug.

"Do not touch him." Castiel found his way to his feet and with one swift motion a demon was ripped out of its vessel. Light spilled from his hand and lit up the terror in Dean's green eyes. Cas looked him over briefly. Dean was pale and blood leaked from his nose.

He spent a moment too long on Dean and he felt a blade graze his side. He fought on. Another blade drove into his forearm as his hand was placed over the forehead of a demon. He began to exorcise it when he was flung into a wall.

"What do you sons of bitches want? Let him go and take me. Let him go!" Dean attacked the nearest demon as Cas got his footing. A demon crept behind the boy as Castiel's eyes widened.

"Dean!"

.

"Raphael? What is going on?"

Cas stood in a lovely room, a banquet table in the center. Art hung on the wall and the paint was thick and bright. Everything seemed bright. His brother sat at the head of the table and others filled in the rest of the chairs.

"Hello Castiel. Welcome back to us."

Castiel tilted his head as other angels gave him their tight attempts at smiles. "I do not understand. I have not been gone long. I was-"

"With the Winchesters. We know."

"Is something wrong? Where is Dean. Please, we must save Dean!"

Raphael smiled. "No, dear one. You have done a commendable job. The boy is safe."

"A real A+ Cassie." Balthazar winked as Raphael gave him a cold look.

"I did not do anything."

"You protected the Winchesters until the oldest came of age. Not an easy task with their never ending string of bad luck. Not to mention that slob of a father they have."

"There were demons sent to kill Dean."

"Yes. Now that Dean is no longer a child we cannot protect him in the same way. We rescued you and patched up your Winchester nicely."

Cas worried with a loose thread at the end of his coat cuff. It had begun to sneak out of the worn cloth and Dean had tugged it free. "Why am I here?"

"We believe a little promotion is in order. Castiel, meet your garrison." Castiel looked perplexed at the stony faces of the angels in front of him. Uriel scowled and looked away but Balthazar gave him two thumbs up.

Cas shook his head slowly. "No thank you. I would rather spend more time with the Winchesters." The room was silent.

"Kid, no angel has commanded a garrison at your age. You should be kissing our shoes!" Zachariah strode over, his murky eyes flashing. His usual smile was set into a snarl.

"I apologize if I seem rude…but I would like to stay at my current position." His wings twitched nervously. "The Winchesters need me."

Raphael slowly made his way over to the small angel. "It seems to me that you need the Winchesters more than they need you."

Castiel flinched at the words but he trusted Dean. He shook his head slowly at the smiling faces. Before anyone could do anything Cas had vanished.

.

"Dean!" Cas zapped right next to him.

"Ahhh! The hell?" Dean nearly rolled off of the bed.

Cas smiled slowly. "I missed you." He buried his face into Dean's chest and felt himself begin to calm down.

"Get off of me you son of a bitch!" Dean pushed Castiel away roughly and he pulled out a sawed off riffle from under his pillow.

"Dean." Castiel moved closer, confusion in his eyes. Dean raised the shot gun.

"I ain't afraid to shoot. Put your filthy hands on me again and I will spill your guts on the rug."

Cas blinked for a moment. "I don't understand."

"Yeah right. All you demons are the same."

"Dean? Are you alright?" Sam wandered into the room sleepily, a gun in his hands as well.

Castiel stood in the middle of them as his Winchesters closed in. Surely Sam hadn't lost his mind as well. He made to move towards the younger brother when a bullet moved cleanly through his back. Blood dripped over his bottom lip as he turned back to Dean. He looked for any recognition in those green eyes. There used to be a smile in them, an extra light that had been saved just for him. Now they were cold and dark.

He left. White wings pushed him into the air as the Winchesters looked in awe, unaware of what had been lost.

.

Dean sat up in bed with heat pulsing through his head. His alarm was ringing loudly on his watch and his heart was hammering painfully in his chest. Dean sat up and glanced around the dark room. The rain stopped. He remembered that it had been raining sometime in the night.

"Sammy? Sam?" Dean wandered into the other room where his younger brother was curled up in a ball on the bed.

"Dean? Uuughhh what time is it?"

Dean glanced at his watch as if he didn't know the answer. "Twelve."

"Well then, happy birthday Dean. Go back to sleep."

"Okay." Dean didn't know why but he felt anxious about something. "I will." He wandered back into his room as Sam yawned slowly.

Dean rested his head on the cool pillow. He stretched for a moment and felt that the side of the bed next to him was warm. The blanket was mussed on the side and the pillow wrinkled. Dean lay still. This was the spot he had been laying on when he woke up. He grasped the blankets for a moment to catch the last of the warmth and wondered why he felt empty when the blanket was cold under his fingers. He forgot about it when the sun forced the night into morning.

.

The years left the memories behind. The shoe Cas lost in the river buried itself deep into the slick muck of the bank. The fort stood standing for a good five years. The boys would have been proud. Rain ate into the carefully tied sticks and leaves. It began to rot. Dean tucked away his mother's book of stories and it lay almost forgotten at the bottom of a worn duffle bag. Sometimes Dean would feel an itch at the back of his brain. He would remember the book for a moment only to forget to release it from a nest of faded t-shirts. Sometimes his dead would show up simply to wail on him and there was no one to run their fingers through his hair. A nasty poltergeist left behind the bodies of people Dean couldn't save. No one held him that night as he cried.

He lost something. He could feel the answer tickling at the back of his mind. And then it was gone.


	10. Into the Fire

**Hey guys! I know this was still later than expected, and I apologize. Thank you for all the kind reviews and favorites. **

**Special thanks to Darkphoenix2345, Silmarilfan1, Castiel52, Gustin, and Dead-Knight-of-Darkness for the reviews. That was sexy of you. I hope you all had an awesome Christmas. I didn't find a naked Misha in any of the boxes, so I am moderately disappointed.**

**-Paperganstah**

"Into the Fire"

There is peace in dreams. Anything can happen before reality creeps in again. Something magnificent happens and morning burns it into memory. It is one thing to remember. What is changed when we look back? What is lost from the feeling of the moment and the hasty recollection drawn from something that fades as soon as it happens?

Dean Winchester forgot Castiel. He forgot those deep blue eyes and gentle smiles. Dean no longer pretended to slay monsters when his guns found real targets. Stories of adventure were better bound up in musty pages. He made up his own stories to take him out of the world he was in. Sam left him and Dean told himself his bitch of a brother would come back. He told himself that John would gank that demon and they would be a family again. He no longer cared if it was called lying or dreaming. Whatever it was, it sure as hell beat reality.

Some nights he let himself sink into the truth. He would be alone, sitting on the front of the Impala or tucked under a gaudy motel blanket. It hurt but it felt clean. The pain was something real for Dean and he rarely indulged in if fully.

Sam returned to him. He was unwilling at first but Jess had been his last chance. Dean would smile at him and pretend for a while that his brother was there because he wanted to be. He told himself he wasn't Sam's fall back plan. Old yellow eyes took John to the grave and followed him soon after. For a while the Winchesters stood in the field missing Mary's smile. Their past lay trapped in photographs and their future stood exposed in front of them. Dean lost the ability to hope that night. John lay on a funeral pyre as flames crawled across his handsome face. Dean felt a numbness crawl through his body.

.

"Castiel. What should we do now?" Castiel squinted at Samandriel for a moment.

"We wait for our orders."

The garrison sat huddled near the gate. He wished Anna was there. She used to know what to do even before the orders were given. Cas remembered how lost he felt when they told him. She fell. He thought about following her into the human realm. He thought about giving up his powers. But for what point? All he ever wanted was Dean and the boy no longer knew his name.

Uriel sat in the grass as he toyed with his blade. It glinted brightly in his dark hands. "Would you like me to seek revelation, brother?"

Castiel shook his head. "When they are ready, they will tell us." Blind faith. That was all he had now. He chose to follow his orders to the best of his ability. God could read between the lines.

"I have never been in a real battle before." Inias was worried. It was evident in his voice. He and Samandriel had the task of rewriting ancient tomes in the dusty halls of the Vatican in the guise of priests. Now that something was killing angels, they were called out. They shouldn't be there.

Castiel placed a hand on his shoulder. "You will learn."

It started to rain. Fat drops of rain pushed down their brooding shoulders. Castiel's eyes narrowed in concentration when a light buzzing hummed in his ears. He took his leave of the garrison and stood by an old oak tree; light spilling over him. The rest of the angels stood proudly in an alcove of large, gray stone.

"He really is beautiful."

Balthazar nodded with a smile. "Our Cassie sure is something different."

"Careful, that is what they said about Lucifer."

Uriel glowered. "Do not say his name, Hester, not when we are so close to him."

"It is a miracle that he turned out so well. We almost lost him to that unhealthy Winchester obsession of his."

"The Winchesters? He was their guardian angel?" Samandriel looked in awe over at where Castiel stood.

Hester nodded. "Yes. He did well for one so young."

"That's not what I heard. He got a little too close to his charges." Uriel looked smug.

Samandriel and Inias shared quizzical looks. "What do you mean?"

"He fell in love with a human. When they promoted him to Seraph he asked to stay with that bow-legged brat instead."

"Dean Winchester? The one we are freeing from damnation?"

"Yes." A shadow of wings fell across the garrison. The younger angels jumped. Castiel gazed at the others through narrowed eyes, as if studying them. "He is of importance to _all_ of us." He gave Uriel a piercing stare.

Samandriel had always admired Castiel. He was beautiful and just; the way God would want his angels to be. There was sadness in him that lent him a strength the others could not understand. He was not cruel but he did not smile. He was blunt with his words but they were truthful. He had lost much. That was evident. Many angels had not the opportunity to care enough about something to lose it.

Now Samandriel understood why Castiel was the strange outsider in their network of brothers and sisters. He gave away a piece of his heart and in return it was patched with something human. It was like an infection. Pain stiffened in his shoulders. It weighed down his once light wings and something dark crept into the veins that ran under his white feathers. Samandriel could understand what Castiel loved in humanity when he saw what it did to Castiel. It made him fragile at times. It also made him aware of the plights of others. They were all afraid to descend into hell. But it seemed Castiel would always pay a greater price for his understanding of the cost.

"What are our orders?" The angels surrounded Castiel with their questions.

Castiel sighed as he slipped the silver blade into his hand. "It is time to fight. Our orders are to get to Dean Winchester and return him, body and soul, to earth. We will lay siege to hell. I do not expect all of us to return." His eyes shifted momentarily to the less experienced angels and he saw fear in their eyes. "If you do not, I thank you for your service."

The words sounded scripted. It was then he saw Balthazar clap his hand on Innias' shoulder in a sign of comfort. He felt compassion well in that rotten human piece of his heart. It ached for the angels that had no other thought than the orders drilled into their heads.

"If you do not wish to fight, please do not. I want you to_ think_ about this. We have been told that Dean Winchester will save us all. We have been told that many of us will die for others to live. What would you leave behind?"

Many of the angels did not understand. What would they leave behind? Troubled they waited for Castiel to lead them to the right answer. Hester blinked her eyes at Castiel in confusion and saw that others looked for answers too. They did not know how to think for themselves.

"Think about what you would give for the completion of this mission. I will give Heaven away for Dean Winchester." A gasp went through the crowd.

"He's mad." Rachel whispered.

Castiel glanced at her. "Do it for God if you wish. If you have nothing to fight for there is no reason to fight alongside me."

"I have told the Council about your insanity, brother. And still they insisted you head this mission. You go ahead and fight for your sanity in the underbelly of the world. I serve God, not a pig filthy human like Dean Winchester." Uriel was off with a quiet rustle of wings.

Castiel almost looked amused. He watched a few more angels followed Uriel. Some were unsure. They had never been given a choice before.

"I am assuming the rest of you are with me?"

"Why Dean Winchester? What is so important about a human that we go to hell for his sake?" A smile ghosted across Castiel's face and the angels were in awe of the creature he had become. A feeling, bleeding thing, and yet he was stronger than them.

"I have been told he will save us. I have not been told how; but I believe it. I have faith in him above all others."

Castiel swiftly severed the ulnar artery in his arm and spread the red blood across the stone. Wind ruffled passed his hair and the ground shifted beneath his feet. The stone began to chip away until a large gash lay in its stead. Castiel surged forward. The angels stood for a moment as the head of their garrison disappeared.

"Well are you all going to stand there like bloody idiots? If anyone can get us in and out of here, it's our Cassie." Balthazar followed his friend and most of the curious angels did as well.

"Cassie! We're here! Some of the dicks decided to hang back."

Castiel glanced back at his brother and nodded. "Good. It means they learned something."

"Those Winchesters sure turned you into a strange one. Not that you weren't before." He clasped his hand onto Castiel's shoulder. "I hope you know what you're doing."

"I don't. I am planning on making it up as I go."

Balthazar shook his head with a smile. "That boy better be worth it."

Castiel played with his sleeve nervously, no longer the cool headed leader. He took in a deep breath and nodded. "He is."

.

Dean had been a rather sensitive child. Not everyone saw it that way as his feelings often manifested themselves in displays of anger. But if he really loved something; damned if he didn't love it with his whole heart. Of course he loved little Sammy. He raised the kid. He was used to failure. Dean had a tendency to assume everything was his fault. His father leaving? His fault. Sammy's death? Dean sought out the burden of guilt to settle on his own shoulders.

When Dean got into one of those moods and sickened himself on a diet of alcohol and despair Bobby told him stories. Sam lay dead and unburied on the hunter's bed and Dean sat next to him. His blood burned warm with poison and the glass sat cold and empty. Bobby had forced him into his arms as the younger man fought. He threw useless punches as he was painfully wrestled to the ground. He broke down then. A grown man with the heart of a child. Bobby held him as the sobs subsided.

"You know, most kids lie to get out of getting' in trouble. You still take on other's crap and call it your own."

"Don't tell me this isn't my damn fault. I had one job. Remember where he got so sick when I left the window open? I wasn't ever going to let that bitch get so much as a scratch again."

Bobby pulled Dean back down as he tried to pull free. "Shut up ya idgit. You've always been a good kid and I wish that John had the balls to tell you that more often."

"I fucked up Bobby." The tears returned in his throat but he held them back.

"You did what you could. You can't control everything. Remember that owl of yours?"

Dean barked out a hollow laugh. "What? What does a dumb bird have to do with anything?"

"Your mamma had just died the year before and you were just little, Sam had just started walking. I don't know what all shenanigans you got up to with John hunting all the time. You found the poor critter bleeding in a gutter and patched it up. I don't know how long you had it before it escaped."

Dean sat up and brushed a hand across his puffy eyes. "I remember that. A little white thing. I-I tried to fix it up. Sammy and I dug up some worms for it but it didn't eat 'em. I made a bed for it in the top dresser drawer. It started to get better too. I read stories to Sammy and the bird looked like it was listening."

Dean remembered but he felt like it was out of someone else's head. The pieces were fuzzy. He closed his eyes and felt ruffled white feathers under his fingers. He felt his breathing calm down. His brain stuttered into darkness.

The man raised his head warily and it was no longer feathers between his fingers but his own hot blood. Chains were sewn throughout his flesh and his throat burned, the screaming trapped in his throat. He clawed at his own destroyed flesh. Screams started near him as another poor soul was dragged onto the rack.

Alistair's nasally voice pierced the thick air. "Dean, Dean, Dean. Sleeping again?" Dean tried to speak but blood welled ahead of the words. His eyes widened at the razor in the demon's hand. "I am here to give you an offer once more. Take this blade and do the job for me. It's you or the bitch. Cut into her and I will leave your precious skin alone."

"Fuck off!" Dean sprayed blood from his mouth as he coughed. He felt the razor sink into the soft skin of his stomach. The feeling never got used to it. Alistair would empty his innards every day for years and still Dean howled with pain. He heard a fluttering of wings in his head as he tried desperately to escape into his mind once more. He thought of white feathers and a warm body in his arms. The demon drove in deeper and Dean snapped.

"Alright I'll do it! I'll do it." Dean shut off the part of his brain that clung onto memories just out of his reach. Something had been missing in there a long time and Dean was done trying to fill in the gaps. The razor was soothingly cold against his palm. He heard the chains clink as they coiled about his feet.

"Give me the damn blade."

.


End file.
